The Nassau Factory

Cha-Cha-Cha-Changes

2012-01-11T18:04:00.000-08:00

I didn't share this earlier, but Ilan has been anxiously awaiting the arrival of his baby sister. In fact, when I was newly pregnant (before I had taken the test) he said to me: "Ima, I am going to be 5 when the baby in your tummy is born." He also announced to family several months before we had our first sonogram that he was going to be having a baby sister. Since we've known there was an issue with her health, he has been praying that God would heal her. He's very proud of her and he's especially excited to have so much pink around. Sigh. When I saw him for the first time after she was born, the first thing he said is "Ima, you can rough house now!" Sounds familiar.

I don't think Aitan had any clue what it meant that baby sister was in Ima's tummy, but we did have some close friends who had a baby this summer so I think he somehow understood what was happening. He's been very curious about her, wanting to touch and hold her as much as possible. He is on maximum security these days. Two days ago I was in the boys room putting laundry away and Scott came in to talk to me. All of a sudden Scott shouts "OH MY GOD!" I look to see Aitan walking in the bedroom holding his sister. Yeah...it took a while for my heart to stop pounding. Fortunately he had her around her waist and he didn't drop her!! He does love her, though and likes to call her "Miss." He also calls her Meshama. He didn't care much for her umbilical cord, which he calls her "belly cord." He kept asking to see it and then would say "It's yucky. I don't have to touch it."

And for the little miss, aka Nes Gadol... She's pretty much a happy camper. She likes her paci, she likes to nurse, she likes to sleep and sometimes we get to see those big blue eyes. She really only cries when she's hungry, having her diaper changed or is over tired (understand that she lives in a house with some very loud boys).

Overall the adjustment has been pretty smooth. Better than I expected. I was so completely fatigued during the pregnancy, that a little bit of sleep deprivation doesn't seem so bad. It's been an easier adjustment emotionally for me as well. When Aitan was born I felt so sad about how it changed things for Ilan and I, but this time around the boys are used to sharing my attention. I'm not a very patient person, so it feels nice to have what little patience I had back. I'm sure the boys appreciate it, too. We've been able to get out a few times and that feels good, too. I think we can do this...

We're home.

2012-01-04T16:22:00.000-08:00

So we learned something this week. Those doctor shows where the doctor says "go run this, that, and the other test," the tests are run immediately, and, even better, the results are also available immediately are pretty far from reality. Having a baby the day before a holiday weekend (one whose holiday is observed the day after the weekend) means any test or procedure will take a very, very long time to approve, to schedule, to perform and to read. Sigh. Feels like we spent so much of these past five days waiting for people who were on holiday or offices/departments that were closed.

We are home today. Finally.

The final diagnosis is agenesis of the left lung, meaning she does not have one. We will follow-up with the cardiologist we have been seeing pre-natally and also a pediatric pulmonologist he suggested. The doctor commented the first night that if we had not had the pre-natal sonogram they would have no indication that there was anything abnormal about her. Because she has only 1 lung we need to be especially cautious about respiratory infections and hand washing, she may be at risk for scoliosis because of the weight imbalance in her upper body, and she will probably not be a marathon runner. I'm sure we will learn more about what to expect from our follow-up appointments, but basically it looks like she will be able to live a fairly normal life.

Thanks to everyone who prayed for us. She was able to start breastfeeding the first night and I was fortunate to have a day nurse who was a lactation consultant on Sunday and Monday, which meant she was willing to call me if Neshama woke up wanting to nurse and I wasn't at her bedside, instead of adhering to a strict 3-hour schedule. So, even with a delay we got off to a good start. She'll get to meet her brothers tonight. I'm sure we'll post pictures at some point.

12 days late

2011-12-31T11:31:00.000-08:00

The last half of this pregnancy has been pretty stressful for me. Knowing there is some mysterious health issue with my daughter, but not knowing what it is exactly or how she will respond when she is born has weighed heavily on me. As a mom of 2 other boys, I couldn’t live in these emotions, and so I processed when I could and had lots of highs and lows. My general sense was that she would be okay, but that it might be a rocky road to get to that point. A couple months before her health issue was discovered I felt like God gave me a warning or premonition that I was going to go though some type of adventure, for lack of a better word. I am not a super adventurous person, but I don’t shy away from it either. As one who has moved across country and even to a different country, I knew that this had to be something way outside of my comfort zone, for God to give me a warning of this sort. As we learned more about our daughter and had to spend 22 weeks in absolute uncertainty, that warning really anchored me. It was such a merciful and gracious gift from the Lord.

Toward the end of the pregnancy I will admit I shut off emotionally. Probably not the best way to deal with things, but survival was my goal. I just wanted her to be born so we knew what we were dealing with. December was hard. Lots of doctors appointments, colds, and not much sleep in addition to the extra holiday activities. I felt sapped of all reserve emotion and energy. As her due date approached we were all on stand by. And by all, I mean Scott and I, our parents, siblings and the many friends and other family members who reached out to us. We thought for sure she was coming the week before Christmas – after all Ilan was 1 day late and Aitan 5. I hardly felt I had the strength to make it that far. As Christmas Eve and then Christmas rolled around my anticipation turned to anger. Frankly, I was pissed that she was still inside and we had no baby and no resolution to question that lurked over our heads. The boys had been with Opa and Oma, Nana and Papa for most of the week before and so we decided to keep them at home and deal with the scenario for our little girl’s birth as a family. As the week drew on, I started to become nervous. All of a sudden I was looking at an induction date and having to decide how I wanted to approach this process. As a doula it is very easy to encourage women to be patient, trust their body, as their due date passes and the pressure to have a baby begins, but as an expectant mother it’s a much different challenge. I sought advice from friends, doulas, midwives about what methods to try, but I didn’t want to spend the second week post-date obsessing about it.

The doctor wanted to induce Sunday if I didn’t have the baby, and wanted me to come in Friday for a non-stress-test. I decided I would have her strip my membrane on Friday if there was no labor and then start castor oil if that didn’t work. But I was also started to recognize how my several weeks of avoiding the subject (mentally) might be coming back to get me. It’s no secret that the mind is the most powerful birthing tool that a woman has. It can work for us positively and negatively. Fear of birth, or certain birth scenarios can be used by our mind to try and protect us, but may also end up contributing to our feared outcomes. It can stall and cripple the birthing process. As I considered this more, I realized I had a problem. My logical mind was telling me that God is in control and that I can trust in him for the outcome (after the birth), but my unconscious mind was saying “The baby is doing just fine inside. If she comes out we’ll be out of control and won’t be able to protect her.” Fortunately I had a tool. I had been doing the HypnoBabies home-study course for natural childbirth and they have a track called “Fear Clearing.” I think part of me avoided listening to this track during the end of my pregnancy as part of my plan to not “go there.” Realizing how I had sabotaged myself, I began to chip away as this defense I had created. For me it wasn’t about the birth – I had chosen the best doctor I could find to support me through this process and I trust my body knows what to do. It was about what happens after the baby’s birth.

So, my plan was to send the boys to their grandparents Friday and Saturday nights and focus on operation Neshama Come Out! The game plan: continue listening to fear clearing, caulophyllum (homeopathically), strip membrane on Friday, acupressure starting Friday night, and castor oil on Saturday.

Thursday I went to bed at 10:30 and woke up around 1:00 am feeling crampy. Went to the bathroom – bloody show. Went back to sleep and woke up at 1:45 again, crampy. Tried going back to sleep listening to some of the HypnoBabies tracks, but could not sleep through the contractions. I had a hard time getting into the hypnosis, so I just stayed in the active mode (center) and listened to the CD’s as I putsed around the house – shower, straightened hair, cleaned out the fridge, made chicken salad, etc. The contractions were intense, but not super regular – averaging from 4 to 15 minutes apart. I called my mom at 5:45 to have her come over because I felt like it would be better to have someone there in case we needed to dash off to the hospital. I was trying to find a supported position that was comfortable to maintain during a contraction, but was struggling for sure. All of a sudden, POP. GUSH. It was about 7:15 and Scott had just rolled out of bed and told him we needed to leave immediately. Part of the trick here was to get to the hospital with enough time for them to observe her in labor and to speak to the neonatologist before hand. Aitan came quick once active labor started and with him my water was intact until I started pushing, so I knew this could get hairy. I rushed Scott out the door and we drove to the hospital.

We arrived at 7:40 am and the secretary told me he was sending me to a triage room. I refused and told him I needed a regular room. He told me he’d take me to the room and I could talk to the nurse about it. I refused. The charge nurse came out. I explained that this was my third baby and that I labored for 1-½ hours with my second and that my water had ruptured. I told her I was 3-4 cm at my exam on Tuesday and I was 12 days past my due date. I concluded my argument: “You are not going to release me, so I’d like a regular room.” She agreed and sent me to a regular room.

Oddly, I wasn’t able to get a hold of my doctor when we left the house. She had given me her cell, which apparently I entered incorrectly in my phone and her office message system was not working properly and didn’t connect me to the answering service. So, my first order of business with the nurse was to make sure she called the doctor. Once we knew she was on her way, the nurse put me on the monitor. When the doctor arrived she did an exam and I was 7 cm. A few contractions later things seemed to just linger and so she checked again and I was almost 10 and she said if I felt the need to push I could. I just really didn’t want to.

I don’t remember pushing being painful or fearful with both boys, but it was very different this time. I just didn’t want to do it and I was afraid to do it. I tried different positions, but I was just miserable. I gently pushed with my breath a few times totally not giving it the full force of my effort and before I knew it she was right there. I was awkwardly splayed on the bed and she had a little trouble working her shoulders out, but the doctor had me pull up on my legs she came right out and onto my tummy. PINK. BREATHING. A big question was whether we could allow the cord clamping to be delayed, but it actually tore on its own and became a moot issue. Time of birth was 9:04 am. She weighed 8 lbs, 2 oz and is 20 3/4 inches.

Scott accompanied her to the NICU where they ordered tests and did further examinations and I was able to join them around 10:00, when the doctor was done fixing me up. She has been on room air, which means she’s been breathing without oxygen support since birth and is doing great. The Neonatologist commented that without the ultrasound at 20 weeks, they probably would not know she has any health issues. What has been determined at this point is that the blood flow between the left lung and the heart was interrupted and so the left lung is undeveloped, but the right lung is compensating (and doing it well). They are going to run more tests Monday or Tuesday (holiday weekend) to get a better idea of what is happening and to see if there are any other related issues. She is breastfeeding as of last night, but they will keep her in the NICU until they have the test results. The doctors and nurses have been fantastic, although we’re frustrated to stay longer because of the holiday.

Her name is Neshama, which means breath in Hebrew. It is the word used when God breathed life into Adam and in Psalm 150, “Let everything that has breath praise the Lord.”

We keep forgetting the camera, but we'll get pictures of eventually.

Popcorn

2011-12-18T14:12:00.000-08:00

My husband, my boys, they all LOVE popcorn! It's a huge treat for the boys and since I've been not the nicest mama lately, I've felt like treating a little more than usual. So, the air popper has had a home on my counter top for the last several weeks and on many days after we pick Ilan up from school the boys gather in the kitchen - Ilan perched on the cabinet and Aitan on a stool and we fire it up. Watching the boys excitement as the kernals start to pop takes me right back to my childhood. I can see my sister and I positioned similarly, waiting with eager anticipation of the metamorphasis. Their pure delight in the process is heartening and reminds me to take better stock of the simple joys of life.

State of the Factory

2011-12-18T08:14:00.000-08:00

Who are we kidding? A few posts all year? Not exactly the content to keep you coming back for more. But as the birth of baby girl, due today, draws near I feel the need to capture some of what life has been like these last several months.

I suppose this pregnancy just started different. I'm not going to say I was sick, but my stomach was definitely more unsettled in the beginning and without predictability there were certain things that just were not going to pass my lips (and I would have preferred to not have pass my nose). Otherwise things were pretty good. I had started taking yoga with some lovely mamas and young 'uns in a friends back yard before I knew I was pregnant and have kept it up with some modification during the entire pregnancy. It's a lovely time to do something for myself and give Aitan the opportunity to play with, push or be pushed by other kids (depending on the day).

I am a certified HypnoDoula with HypnoBabies, so I thought I'd investigate that route for comfort management during the babies birth. Admittedly, I've slacked in listening the tracks the last several weeks. I need to get back on that. I'm hopeful it will help me have an easier, more relaxed birth. I don't feel like either have been sooo bad to this point, but if it can be even better, then I'm all for it!

At our diagnostic ultrasound our perinatologist (Dr. Bochner) was having trouble viewing the baby's entire heart and referred us to a pediatric cardiologist. This has issued in a slew of doctors appointments and a huge change in my birth plan, as I was originally planning to give birth at home with midwives from the Sanctuary. There is no clear diagnosis at this point. What we know is that the baby's heart is rotated to the left, but seems to be connected and functioning properly. The most recent theory is that her lungs (or one of them) may not be fully developed and therefore not acting as an "anchor" for the heart. There is no way to diagnose this before she comes so we are waiting and praying that upon her arrival she will breathe and her body will be able to sustain itself without medical intervention.

As my pregnancy comes to an end, I am finding myself very reliant upon and very thankful for friends and family who have helped lighten my load (and in the process have probably spared my sons' lives). Between doctors' appointments and just regular life this mama is tired and ready to meet baby girl.

It's been a little strange going through this process without a whole lot of surety. I do feel like God gave me a premonition of something outside my comfort zone that was coming my way. I can't say that I've enjoyed the ride, but knowing that God is in control has made a big difference. I feel his peace and most of the time I am positive. Every now and then I get a little weepy, just stewing over all of the possibilities, but however hard the process, I do believe it will be good in the end. So, we wait.

Becoming a Soccer Mom

2011-12-15T20:04:00.000-08:00

Ilan had his first experience with organized sports this year and, thus, I became a soccer mom. At age 5 they don't take things too seriously, so practice was only once a week with a Saturday morning game. Scott was roped in as coach and one of Ilan's buddies was recruited for our team. When I say recruited I mean that we knew we were short a player and so I called to see if they were interested, but as it turns out Will participates in a soccer clinic and was an asset to the team. Ilan did really well, usually scoring a goal or two at each game. They don't keep score for the young'uns, and half the time half the team was kicking the ball in the wrong direction, but we managed to have fun and keep Aitan off the field (most of the time).

The Long Overdue Birthday Post for Aitan

2011-09-07T22:11:00.000-07:00

Let me start by saying that Aitan's name means strong or steadfast. He is. As I am writing it is 9:25 pm and Aitan just fell asleep - he was put to bed at 6:30 pm. Sigh. This little spark of a boy sure keeps us on our toes and brings a lot of joy around these parts (even when it's something none of us should laugh at).

Aitan knows what is in his closet and he asks for shirts by name - Monster shirt, Dodger shirt, scary firegurt (fireworks) shirt, Spiderman shirt, Thomas shirt, etc. Most days he has a strong preference and there will just be no negotiating. He's the same way with shoes - he cried for days when I took away his crocs that were waaaay to small for him.

He likes to pour liquids. Yes, he can drink from a cup, but this boy will not be trusted with a cup until this pouring thing comes to an end. If there is a liquid in a cup beware! He will find it. He will pour it.

He talks a lot. He gives a running commentary on everything going on around him. He's very auditory and picks up on words, phrases and songs very quickly. The other day I caught him singing "Hey Porter" by Johnny Cash. One of his more favorite phrases lately is "Who wants ice cream?" Pretty sure Frostini is the originator. Another good one is "Don't say that word!" Wonder where he learned that one... He's had a few short-lived variations of saying yes without actually saying yes. It started with uh-huh, then yup, then I know (which really got confusing), and now I think we're set on yes.

He likes attention. If Aitan does something naughty and gets a laugh, he will do it over and over again. One evening at dinner we went to sing our prayer "God our Father..." and Aitan said "God our poop..." Ilan laughed of course and that little phrase has been around ever since. Shocking, isn't it? And from a pastor's son. Sigh.

He likes to run. Ugh. He loves to run! He gets so much joy from just running up and down the driveway, but I think his favorite place to run is away from Abba or Ima. I'm so thankful for a stroller with straps! Even more thankful for spaces where he can run free and I don't have to worry about cars!

He loves his paci. Not uncommon to hear "need it, paci" around these parts. There are days when he just wants it so much we give him a little extra time in his bed to be with paci. He usually hollers when he's ready to come out.

He's a little bit of a trouble maker. Just watch him get that devilish look before he does the forbidden. Oh, how he thrives on it! Yes, and trouble finds him or he finds it without fail. If it's quiet, you can count on the fact that you've got trouble!!

He loves trains. He carries "my Thomas" with him wherever we will let him.
He loves to laugh. And it's infectious.

He loves to cuddle and has recently started telling us "I looove you," usually along with a kiss and a squeeze.

In the hospital

Celebrating year #1 at Dodger Stadium

The birthday boy

The Long Overdue Birthday Post for Ilan

2011-09-07T21:24:00.000-07:00

(This one will be a bit philosophical - especially because it is also written on the day that Ilan started kindergarten.)

It's really hard to believe that Ilan is five. He was just a baby. The transformation from baby to little boy to just boy has been so gradual that I almost didn't notice it happening. On his birthday Ilan asked if he was taller now that he is 5. I had to explain that you grow a little bit all the time and that it's gradual. Of course it's this way with his development. Every once in a while I think back and wonder "Were we able to talk with Ilan about this a year ago?" or "Could he do that a year ago?" I just don't remember some of the progress. Then I get blown away by something he says or does.

Ilan loves pink. He often asks for toys in pink or chooses the pink option when given a choice. I'm pretty sure every man reading this is made a little nervous by that fact, but it's just a color.

He earned his yellow belt in Tang Soo Do this year. Since he has started karate we have seen him go from the youngster who liked to be a clown to a (more) serious student who is growing in skill.

He likes to be good at things. So, when something doesn't come easily or naturally or is a little scary he really doesn't want to try it. I can relate. This is an area where we have had to help stretch him. He's been challenged to go down the pole (which he now loves), sound out words, ride thunder mountain (which he also loves), catching a ball with his glove etc. It's a challenge to know what to push and what to leave alone.

He loves to play games. Favorites include Candyland, Uno (Handy Manny Version), Chutes and Ladders, and Trouble. He tries to be a good sport, but usually if he doesn't win he wants to know if you won for him. Sure. Why not.

He loves people. He loves being around people and interacting with them. He plays rough, but usually has the best of intentions. It's sweet to see him rescue other kids who are in need of help and he plays very sweetly with younger children (excluding that which is his brother) and can be very thoughtful. He's also very sensitive.

He is a quality time guy. A little undivided attention goes a long way.

He loves sports and the outdoors.

He has a bit of a shoe fetish.

It's been so much fun to see how his mind works and watch him grow and reach goals. I love our little philosophical conversations, his curiosity and zest for life. Love this big boy and can't wait to see how he changes in the year to come!

Ilan on my chest in the hospital

Around just before his first birthday - he still has some of the red, but not enough hair for curls.

Celebrating his 2nd birthday in Naples.

Waiting for birthday cake.

Celebrating his 4th at Jumpin' and Jammin'

On the birthday choo choo train.

First day of Kindergarten

2011-09-07T19:31:00.000-07:00

Ilan came in this morning just before 6:00 ready to get a start on the day. We made whole wheat peanut butter waffles together, made his lunch and sat down for breakfast before anyone else woke up.

Then it was time to get ready. Ilan didn't really care to wear his closed toed shoes, which made for a few teary pictures, and he was a little disappointed that he had to wear a uniform instead of the "fancy clothes" he wanted to wear, but in the end he was (almost) in uniform and excited to finally don his Mario Kart backpack.

Ilan crying over the shoe situation

On the way home I asked Ilan was the best part of his day was and he said recess. I asked what the worst part was and he said there wasn't a worst part. So I asked what was the next best thing and he said coloring. He then offered up that #3 was going to the bathroom. They have bathrooms everywhere - even outside, and they all have urinals. So there you have it.

It was fun to talk with him about all the things he did during the day and it feels like he's grown up so much just in one day. Sigh.

I surprised him with a balloon-filled living room when we got home and was not surprised that Scott received a call from the landlord at about the same time. Oh well. You only live once.

My little fishies

2011-07-19T14:12:00.000-07:00

Ilan had such a great time swimming in Palm Springs on our vacation that I really wanted to be sure to get him into swim lessons this year. I, however, procrastinated in my search of swim schools and waffled over the very expensive and snooty or public pool variety and then it finally occurred to me that I should look into the city colleges. Aha! I discovered when Ilan went to do his swim test to see where he would place that I was more than a little too late as many of the classes had 20+ kids on the waitlist. Bummed, I put Ilan and Aitan on the list for a couple classes and hoped they'd make it in.

The guy mentioned swim passes and I was intrigued. For several years during my childhood we were part of Gerrish Swim Club in Altadena and we spent hours in the pool each week. The price was right and I couldn't pass it up. So, once or twice a week the boys and I head over to the Santa Monica Swim Center and get our fill of the saltwater pool. I usually pack a lunch and they boys crash in the car on the way home. Delight.

Fortunately, we were called from the waitlist for Ilan so we've been there 4/7 days for the last two weeks. Ilan is doing great in his class and I am so glad he is at exactly the right level. He's being challenged, and is learning technique, but is not being pushed too far. It's perfect!
What is a day at the pool without a little Foster's Freeze to finish it off? I might have searched this one out and made an extra stop, but there happens to be a Foster's Freeze right across the street. I'm just wondering how we keep this from an every-time occurrence. Ilan was a little unsure of a chocolate dipped Ice-cream and opted for sprinkles, but I think he might make the switch next time. Aitan and I shared a chocolate dipped swirl. Once we got home and I transferred the boys from the car, I headed straight for the resolve. Chocolate everywhere!

Springtime is for Strawberries

2011-07-08T14:37:00.000-07:00

Wait a minute, you might say... This is not spring. No. Springtime has come and gone and I have some catching up to do. I think I only went strawberry picking once as a child, while we were visiting my grandparents in Ohio, but it made a huge impression. As an adult I love giving my kids the opportunity to head out to the farm and pick some of their own fruit and vegetables. Plus these hand-picked strawberries are just so amazingly good! I try to go to the strawberry patch at least a couple times each spring. This year we made a playdate out of it with some good friends from OC.

Trip to the Desert

2011-05-01T22:36:00.000-07:00

Our annual trip to Palm Springs was probably the best it's ever been. Every year Ilan spends as much time in the water as we'll let him, but this year he wanted to spend just about every waking moment at the pool. He always starts off a little slow and water shy, but within minutes he was diving (while holding on to a hand or rail) for his Spiderman dive toys and torpedoes. Soon enough he started swimming distances. It's great to see you kiddo reach milestones and I can't wait to give him swim lessons to help him feel even more confident (and safe) in the water. He made friends with a couple older girls (15 and 9) who played with him every afternoon and were able to challenge him to do things he wouldn't do if it were just us asking. It was great. They were so sweet with him.

Aitan loved the water, too. He would sit splashing on the steps, saying "Water. Fun." He is fearless and loves to swim while being held up. He also loved it when Scott would throw him up in the air and he quickly caught on and started counting to three on his own.

One of the highlights of the trip is heading to the living desert to see the trains. The animals are good, too, but let's not kid anyone...the boys LOVE the huge train exhibit.

They had fun banging on the drums, too.

When we weren't in the water, Papa and Nana were often taking the boys to feed the ducks, play baseball or help Ilan ride his bike.

Cutting Hair

2011-04-05T22:41:00.000-07:00

Cutting hair is a big topic around these parts. Often it comes in the form of unsolicited advice, but I suppose we should expect that having two boys with longer hair. Once Ilan's hair was even trimmed by a well-meaning Nana who thought we wouldn't notice. But this haircutting was totally self-inflicted:

I was putting my make-up on and Ilan was in the bathtub. All of sudden he announces "Oh look, a piece of my hair." and hands me a lock of his hair. I ask him if something pulled his hair or if he had cut it (he was cutting some paper earlier) and he said no. He just handed me the mysterious piece of hair. Something was fishy. So, I pondered, and searched the internet, and then figured if it was an illness more will come out and then I'd start to panic.

An hour later Ilan and I are working on a puzzle in his workbook and it hits him what happened to his hair (I think admission of guilt was timed to be at the moment I might react the least). "Oh, I know what must have happened. When I was cutting my ribbon (from a craft he made at school) I must have cut of piece of my hair!" So, we had a little chat about cutting our own hair and the mystery was solved.

I'm sorry if you've mistaken one of my boys for a girl, or if you are opposed to long hair on boys, but it probably bothers you more than it does us. We love our boys hair.

Eaton Canyon

2011-04-01T16:41:00.000-07:00

I wanted to be sure to get the boys to Eaton Canyon for some good ole water playin' and rock throwing before the stream dries up. Ilan loves it and Aitan, well, last year he ate a good share of rocks. There is no worry of low-water. The stream was gushing and I was a little nervous letting Ilan play independently while I kept Aitan out of mischief. It made picture taking a bit of a challenge, but I got a few good ones. I don't plan on making this trip by myself again, but I'm sure I can wrangle up another adult who'd like to join us.

Balloons

2011-03-15T14:12:00.001-07:00

Sunday my mom gave me a huge pack of balloons and Ilan had been asking me ever since he saw it if he could blow one up. I kept saying no, not right now. On our way home from my parents I had an idea to blow a bunch of them up and surprise the boys in the morning when they woke up. Scott thought I was insane considering we have trouble with kid stuff being all over the apartment anyway, but I thought the fun would be worth it. When they were all in the center of the room there were about 30 balloons which covered most of the floor in our living room. As a side note, it's surprisingly easy to push all the balloons from the center of the room to the wall and under tables, thus making a formerly filled room look empty. Anyway, here are some photos from the day of fun.

I think Ilan was a little bewildered when he walked out into the living room.

Counting the balloons.

Trying to blow one up.

Look at that snotty nose in an otherwise adorable picture.

The boys found fun running and dispersing the balloons and Ilan took to running and diving when he reached the far end of the room.

Playmates

2011-02-18T20:59:00.000-08:00

I think Aitan has officially become a playmate for Ilan. Of course he doesn't really get the games and such that Ilan wants to play, but he goes along pretty well. Aitan has fallen in love with Thomas and often we wake up to a little boy in his crib shouting "choo choo." He loves all things with wheels and has a keen ear for the trash truck. He may be pretty like a girl, but he is boy, boy, boy. Here are some pics of them in the bath tonight. Love how they play together and make each other laugh. Reg was right...your love grows exponentially...

This sweet and devilish little smile just warms my heart.

My Mission

2011-01-31T18:41:00.000-08:00

The month of February without dessert or candy. This is my mission. I've heard it said that disciplining the body helps discipline the soul. So, we'll see. This girl is in desperate need of both.

The Pole

2011-01-21T22:21:00.000-08:00

Recently a controversial article by Amy Chua was published by The Walstreet Journal. It was interesting to me because, even though I find her method of parenting to border abuse and deeply troublesome, I recognized that I was the typical western parent antithesis to her superior Chinese variety. Do I press Ilan to do anything he doesn't want to do? Well, I make him bath, which is a hot or cold kind of thing, I brush his teeth, make him go to bed, usually struggle over eating healthy foods, etc. But, do I encourage him to grow in areas of weakness or pursue things that may not come naturally to him? Not really. He does Karate, but I don't make him practice. We do our letters, but usually I let him finish when he feels done. Truth is I myself lack discipline and my lack of discipline could keep my child from being the best that he can be.

I feel like this whole idea has sort of opened a can of worms for me and I feel like God is hitting me hard on my own lack of discipline. Not in a bad way, but in a "now that you see it, let's tackle it" kind of way. But, as it relates to parenting I see that if I love my sons, I will help them achieve things that they think are too hard. Not with harsh words or threats but with encouragement and belief that they can do it. So, I had a little test with Ilan. I was working at his school a couple of weeks ago and noticed on the playground that one of the boys about his age just zipped down the pole. I know Ilan is a little fearful of heights and asked him if he'd ever gone down the pole. I know he can do it, but thought he might be a little fearful of it. He said no and considered it and even held on and reached out a little, but that long reach really spooked him. I didn't push it then, but when we were home we had a chat about it. I told him that I knew it was scary to him and that I thought he could do it and would really have fun once he did it. He promised that next time he would go down it. So, at the park of Friday we had our chance. I didn't make a big deal of it. I just told him it was time and reminded him that he agreed he would do it. He was nervous and tried to delay, but I assured him I would be right there to help him. So, he took his time. And he did it. Three times. I could see how proud of himself he was and I was proud, too.

This may be a surprise, but I struggle with confidence. Not in the sense that I don't think I can do something, but I guess I think other people will not give me the chance. I often put myself in safe situations where I know I do well and don't step outside my comfort zone and reach for something higher. So, it's really important for me to instill in my boys a sense of confidence that they can do whatever they set their minds to. And I guess for now that means helping them see that they can do something scary or hard...like going down a pole at the park. Not because I will shame them into it, but because I believe they can do it.

Just how much kids really mean to parents

2011-01-21T21:01:00.000-08:00

I had a pre-natal appointment with a client the other day and met Scott and the boys at my parents house for dinner afterward. When I got there I noticed my baby book was on the coffee table so I started looking through it. I found this crumpled article by Erma Bombeck in there, and I'm sure my mom put it there as a reminder that no matter how exasperating I (we?) could be, we really did bring her joy.

I don't think my parents ever said any of the cruel statements listed in the beginning, but I know Edie (my grandpa's companion) once told my brother to go play in traffic and my young mind just couldn't understand the sarcasm. This being told to him as she was trying to spray him down with cold water from a hose. That was the weekend my parents left us with Noni and Edie. I think we were all glad when it was over.

But that's beside the point. No matter how exhausting being a mom can be, the hardship can not compare to absolute joy children bring to your life. I have no idea when this piece was written, but it seems obvious that at moments we all need to be reminded that our children are a blessing. And, more importantly, those precious souls need to be reminded (every day) just how much we love them.

Just how much kids really mean to parents.

Adults do a lot of kidding about children.

How often have we said"Go out and play in the traffic." "Marrying your father was my first mistake. You were my second." Or, "If God had meant for mothers to take their kids to church, He would have put restrooms at the end of each pew."

I've said a lot of those things. It's a release hatch to let out some frustrations, the exhaustions, the pressures of raising children.

But sometimes I wonder if children ever know how most of us really feel about them.

Children hear a lot about the women who don't want kids to clutter up their lives. But do they know that every year, thousands of men and women keep charts, burn candles and seek medical help in an effort to have a baby?

Children are always reading in a newspaper how some child was abandoned in a bus station or left in a car to be discovered by anyone. But do they know that for every abandoned child, there's a list of adoptive parents who have waited and prayed for years to hold a baby?

Children hear a lot these days about abortion and the women who want to terminate a pregnancy. But do they know that some prospective mothers lie flat on their back for months, dedicate their entire being to this life within them, and some even put their own life on the line just to hand onto the precious child inside?

Children are forever hearing how much they cost, how much trouble they are, and how much different their parents' lives would have been without them.

And yet - those of us who have miscarried a child can still mist up when we talk of the emptiness - the pain - the sadness of never knowing what might have been. They don't know about that.

One of my sons fell into a chair the other day and said, "What can I do?"

"Have you thought of tearing down your room and planting trees?"

When I returned he was leafing through his baby book where pasted over his picture was a quote: When asked "What is the most wonderful thing that ever happened to you?" a woman answered, "Holding th baby you've been told by experts you will never have."

"You're a fake." he smiled, slamming the book shut.

Now he knows.

Mr. Polite

2011-01-08T11:50:00.000-08:00

I have been working with Ilan to put the toilet seat up when he's pees. He just doesn't like to take that extra step and it only takes one time sitting on a toilet seat covered in pee to make it a big issue in the house. So, when I notice there is pee on the seat I have been making him come in and clean the toilet and I remind him that he wouldn't have to do it if he lifts the seat when he goes potty.

So, I was in the bathroom cutting my toenails (TMI?) and Ilan came in and said he had to go potty. I noticed that he lifted the lid first and so I thanked him. His reply: "No, it's my pleasure." What a guy.

Time Out

2011-01-05T17:54:00.001-08:00

I'm pretty sure Ilan had time out starting from an early age. I vaguely remember thinking that I wanted to help him understand what time out was before he got too old and I do remember our childless friend in Israel judging us for time out. I also remember my family having such a hard time avoiding laughter and eye-contact with him when he was on time out. At some point you've got to figure out a way to teach your children what is acceptable behavior, and hopefully it is a non-violent method. So, yesterday I posted that Aitan has a habit of throwing food at dinner and he really thinks it hilarious. Hilarious. It doesn't help that he has a big brother who laughs at him when he does it. He is totally the class clown in the making. He just thrives on the attention. Yes, this food throwing has gone from a nuisance to a behavior issue really fast. Admittedly, we've been lazy on discipline with Aitan. The last week or so we've been smacking his hand, which doesn't work, and it also doesn't feel right and so we're returning to the old time-out. Tonight at dinner between time-outs (because he had like 7 of them) he would raise his hand like he was going to throw food or mash it into his hair and he would go whoooaaaa whoooaaaa while raising and lowering his voice. Totally testing us and hoping to get a reaction.

I've been reading happiest toddler on the block and the basic suggestions for interacting with your toddlers during high-emotion moments and during discipline are to validate their feelings in an age appropriate manner and to stop all the chatter and communicate in a way they can relate to, connecting to the right side of the brain. One of his suggestions for stopping behavior is to growl. (I can't write this without laughing) The idea is that this is a non-verbal way to communicate disapproval and they can understand that more clearly than reason. One time I tried this on Ilan (admittedly, I think he was too old, but it was a shot in the dark) and he immediately responded in tears and said "Ima, why did you do that to me? " I couldn't help but start laughing and he did too. Fail. So, I thought Aitan was much younger and it might work with him, so when I tried growling at him, accompanied by "No throwing food, Aitan. No thowing." He just looked up at me and smiled and started to giggle. It's not something I would say is in my comfort zone, so you can imagine how incredibly ridiculous I felt. So, it looks like growling is out the window, too. Hopefully Aitan will catch on that time out stinks.

Breaking a habit

2011-01-04T19:51:00.000-08:00

Aitan has a nasty little habit of throwing all food in his sight across the room - and I do mean across. In a moment of frustration I sternly told him "I will break you of this habit." Ilan immediately broke into hysterics and through the tears I understood something about him not having a brother anymore. Poor thing was worried I was going to break Aitan. I assured him that I wasn't going to break his brother and explained what "breaking a habit" is. When he was set at ease I gave him a big hug...glad he loves his brother so much.

Ilan's collarbone is healing nicely from the bed-cident. He'll be back in karate this week. Lately he's taken to asking about the origin of his food and whether or not it had to be killed or if it came from the ground. I'm not sure if this curiosity is about a sensitivity to animals or just trying to understand how the world works.

Aitan has more and more words. I gave him a little "rice nog" mixed in his milk a couple of times and he started saying neh-noh. I thought he might have been trying to say Nina, but it didn't really make sense. Then we were at Oma and Opa's and Oma asked Ilan if we wanted egg nog and Aitan watched over to the fridge and said neh-noh. Now whenever he wants milk he says neh-noh and even said it to me today when he was nursing. Other words include (but are not limited to) Dodgers, baseball, ima, abba, ebah (which I think is brother), whoa, no, mine, more, all gone, ball, night night...

We are not cutting Aitan's hair until he is three, so this has led to a little issue with vision. I've tried putting a hat on to keep his hair out of his eyes, but he keeps pulling it off. So, we've been pulling his bangs back with a clip. You have to know when you have a pretty boy and you put his hair in a clip people are going to ask how old "she" is. I'm resigned to the fact that I will have to do a lot of explaining over the next couple years.

I received a new lens for my camera this Christmas, so look for pictures that have more natural lighting!!

The Competitor

2010-11-30T13:48:00.000-08:00

Scott clued me in to a little bit of boy-parenting that has eliminated numerous arguments between Ilan and I and pretty much secured my sanity during this stage of life: competition. If there is ever anything I want Ilan to do all I have to do is make it a competition. As in, I bet your brother is going to get buckled into his seat before you (because you know if it wasn't a competition I'd be coaxing Ilan out of the back of the car long after Aitan was in his seat and buckled) or I bet I can clean up more toys than you, or who is going to be the first person to get their shoes on? Yeah. Saved. My. Life.

So, today I had Aitan on my lap and was getting his shoes on. Ilan was on Scott's lap and Scott was reading him a Bible story, when Ilan interrupted him to tell him that Aitan broke his toy helicopter. He then said, "Abba, let me down so I can beat Aitan." Scott and I both startled a bit and Scott said something along the lines of "You want to beat your brother?" Ilan, "Yes." Scott, "Ilan, we never beat our brother no matter what he does." Ilan replies, "But I need to beat him." Silence. "He's going to get his shoes on before me!" Followed by a collective "AAAAHHH!" from Abba and Ima.

Phileo

2010-10-13T22:47:00.000-07:00

brotherly love

Pictures

2010-10-06T21:36:00.000-07:00

I've been playing around with the camera the last few days. The results are clearly unbalanced. Ilan won't look at me when I have a camera in my hand and if he does he likes to give that cheesy, my face looks like it hurts, smile and Aitan sure has some big expressions....

Aitan is Walking?

2010-10-03T15:10:00.001-07:00

It's hard to pin down when Aitan started walking. We've known for over a month now that Aitan can take steps, but it's taken until yesterday, I'm pretty sure, to realize that this is a means of transportation not just a cute parlor trick. Yes, he's taken many steps, but when he realizes what he's doing he stops and starts crawling. In his defense he is an excellent crawler and it probably is frustrating to spend so much energy learning to walk when crawling is effortless, but I'm pretty sure he has seen the light. Yesterday at the mall play area he took a long walk about 1/2 the distance of the playground. Since then I would say he's been 50-50% with walking. If he's on his feet he'll try and go the distance.

Two Topics, One Post

2010-09-15T22:13:00.000-07:00

One post, two entirely unrelated topics. First, it's September and there are billboards all over town advertising the shows that are premiering this month. So, Big Bang Theory has a billboard with bubbles or packing peanuts or some other white things and the heads (and some hands) of the characters poking through. A few weeks ago we passed one and Ilan said: "Ima, that person on that sign looked like you. I'm not sure if it was a girl or boy, though." So, this has started a series of conversations about the billboards and specifically whether or not I look like one of them. Scott and I have tried to figure out which one he was talking about and good fortune has it that today we were stopped on Olympic at La Cienega and there was a Big Bang Theory billboard right in front of us. So, if you were wondering he thinks that I look like the guy on the top right, but he also thinks I look like all of them.

And, we went camping a couple of weeks back with some friends. We had a great time and enjoyed all of the kids shenanigans! Here are a few pictures:

The Second Birthday Boy

2010-08-31T09:15:00.000-07:00

Okay...started this post on little A's birthday, but well, life has been busy!

Well, a year ago today Aitan made his entrance into the world. I've been posting progress reports for him, so there's not a lot of new information. I don't remember if I posted that he has two more teeth as of a couple weeks ago. And three more since I started this post. Yes, the little guys has been busy cutting teeth and sleep has been thrown off big-time. At his 1-year appointment he weighed 20 lbs and was 31.5 inches. He's long and lean.

My sweet little baby, you are such a delight to all who are around you. You are easy going and sweet and have an amazing smile that can warm the hardest heart. It is clear to me that you know what you want and I look forward to depth in your communication this next year. You are loved very much!

The Birthday Boy

2010-08-24T07:56:00.000-07:00

In our effort to rush out the door yesterday and give Ilan a very special birthday, I didn't get to write a post for him. So, here is my belated birthday post.
Dear Ilan,

My baby is turning 4! You will always be my baby, but you are now a little boy so full of life. I love your enthusiasm and your love for people. You make friends anywhere because you are willing to play with anyone that wants to play. I love how you are sweet and protective with the younger kids and love to run behind the older kids!
We can see your leadership in how you play and even in how you give orders at home (especially to Oma and Papa, your willing subjects!). At any opportunity where there is a disagreement between you and Abba or me, you take the lead in negotiating a settlement. Sometimes your cleverness amazes me!

If you wake up when I come in to nurse your brother in the morning, often the first words out of your mouth are "Ima, I love you." You are so sweet and cuddly, yet you LOVE to rough house and jump, smack, climb and throw! I can't wait until your brother is older to take on some of your energy because Ima can't keep up!

You bring so much joy to my life and I thank God for you. I am proud of you and can't wait to see how you grow and mature in this next year!
Love,

Ima

Turning four at Jump'n JamminWaiting for cake at Nana and Papa's

Two in Napoli

One in DallasOn the day of his birth

Update on the Kermunchkin

2010-08-19T21:13:00.000-07:00

Baby A had a big day today. He took his first steps (when I say steps I mean that he took one step before loosing his confidence and falling, but done several times throughout the day) and I'm pretty sure he knew he did something cool. Can't believe he's almost a year!

His little personality is shining through. Most of the time he is super sweet, easy going, and loves to be around people. He adores his big brother, loves to wrestle (actually it's probably more of a survival instinct), climb and dances anytime there's music on. His favorite passtimes are playing in the toilet and emptying the cupboards and drawers. He also is a little dramatic. If he doesn't get something he wants or his brother is being mean to him he'll put his head down on the ground between his legs or throw his body onto the ground and cry and he's also started doing this high-pitched squeal if there's something he wants and we're not getting it for him right away. sigh. It's cute now, but I can only imagine what it's going to be like in a year from now!

He's picking up more words, and since Scott kept tapping himself on the chest while saying Abba, Aitan has now started to do the same. He lets you know he wants something by opening and closing his hand and when he wants more he claps his hands together.

I tried giving him different loveys, but he just wants the paci...two of them. One to have in his mouth and one to hold on to.

The Negotiator

2010-07-27T10:00:00.001-07:00

People with great passions, people who accomplish great deeds, people who possess strong feelings, people with great minds and a strong personality rarely come out of good little boys and girls. -L.S. Vygotsky

I saw this quote and it really made me think about how we parent Ilan. I don't think of Ilan as a "bad" boy, because most of the time he is sweet and loving and cooperative and even when he's not cooperating he's not usually mean spirited. When he bonks his brother, for example, it is usually preceded by "please no" a couple times in the effort to get him to stop messing with whatever he is messing with.

Lately we've had a really hard time getting him to listen as in I'm really not sure he heard what I just said to him, as in please stop what you are doing and acknowledge that I am talking to you, as in did you hear that I just asked you not to... It's hard to know whether he is so involved in what he's doing that he really doesn't "hear" or whether there is some selective hearing going on. And then there are the differences of opinion. Last week when I wouldn't let him watch a movie he actually locked me out of the house when I went out to water the plants and turned it on (fortunately it didn't take much for him to let me back in).

I'm so glad that Ilan thinks independently and is even comfortable enough having a "showdown" with Scott and I, because it's part of his personality working itself out. I see a lot of leadership traits in him and want to be so careful to help shape them without squelching them. So, the truth is, I have no idea how to respond to these situations. He can't always have his way, so how do you teach them to question or disagree respectfully so that an agreement can be made? Because he will negotiate... And how do you teach them that sometimes they just have to listen to you? I totally reemed him the other day: I told him to stay by me in the parking lot while I got his brother in the car seat and he wandered off on to the other side of the car. I really wasn't mad, but I just felt like he needed to see how important it was that he not do that and I didn't know how else to get through to him.

So to recap, I have no idea how to speak to Ilan so that things will sink in and I've got to figure out how to peaceably stand my ground, because if it's not a battle of the wills it is often me caving and giving him what he wants. Ah the guilt.

Bath time for the baby

2010-07-23T19:23:00.000-07:00

I gave Aitan a bath after lunch today while Ilan was recovering from his dentist appointment and got some cute play time on video. Today he started saying the word ball. When we sit on the potty we read a David Shannon board book and the first page says "David's first words were... Ball." on the next page "Uh oh" and a picture of David looking through the window he broke with the ball. He's been trying to say uh oh for a while now, but has a little trouble executing.

Most of his words are pretty much only understood by me, but I do know what he is saying when he says pahbhee he wants his paci. I think he tries to say Ima, but it sounds more like "Amah" and he does say Abba, but I'm not convinced that he is trying to say Abba. I think it is one of those common sounds that babies make because he has been saying it a lot while Scott is gone.

Beach Trip

2010-07-10T22:24:00.000-07:00

It's a rare weekend when Scott and I don't have a whirl of activity. We took advantage of the day and headed to the beach with the boys. It wasn't much of a beach day - cool and overcast, but we thought we'd at least have fun playing in the sand and Mother's Beach in Marina Del Rey has a playground to keep them busy.

Toward the end of the day I had Aitan in the swing and was chatting with the woman pushing her daughter in the swing next to me. I looked down and Aitan's little head was bobbing - he was trying to keep from falling asleep! I think we wore them out pretty well and we even got to fly our spiderman kite (any guesses what letter we're covering this week?).

The worst part of the beach is sand everywhere! I have to constantly remind myself that it's okay for the boys to get dirty like this...sand is just not my friend. They cleaned up nicely, though, and now I am off to do the same.

Oh how my boys have grown

2010-06-25T22:26:00.000-07:00

Ilan the day after his birth...Ilan last week...

Aitan the week of his birth...
Aitan last week...

You know you need a break when...

2010-06-21T13:27:00.000-07:00

So, I just had a fleeting moment of temptation and I thought I would share because I think many of us moms would appreciate to know we aren't the only ones who have taken short-cuts out of sheet desperation!! So, I will share my little tidbit, but what I would like you who are reading to do is either comment on blogspot or facebook with a short-cut you've taken or been tempted to take.

Scott has taken the boys out for a couple of hours so I can get some cleaning done and as I went to change Aitan's crib sheets, I removed the matress pad and noticed that there were crumbs and bits of sand on his sheets. I looked at it and contemplated the ordeal of changing all the bedding and was for a moment tempted to use the dust-buster instead.

Hikin' Canyon

2010-06-18T14:12:00.000-07:00

One of our favorite spots in Pasadena is Eaton Canyon, or Hikin' Canyon as Ilan likes to call it. Most of the year there is no water and Ilan just likes to climb on the rocks and run around, but in the winter and sometimes in the spring there is a stream that runs through the canyon with icy cold water. We were lucky to find water still in the canyon when we went with Ethan and Kylie on Wednesday.

Rock Around the Clock

2010-06-12T13:53:00.000-07:00

Whenever Aitan hears music his little legs start to bop. The other day we caught him rocking to Rock Around the Clock on the rocking chair. He's been climbing and climbing and we have got trouble!! Look out!

9 Month Comparison

2010-06-03T21:58:00.000-07:00

An entry for the baby album

2010-06-03T21:05:00.000-07:00

Baby A is now 9-months old and here are his stats: height - 29.5 inches (80%), weight - 18 lbs (10%). He is crawling and pulling-up on almost anything he can and can pretty much get into whatever he wants to (whether we want him too or not). It looks like we are going to have to get some child-proofing done around these parts.

He had his first camping trip this past weekend and did a great job. He seemed to love being outdoors and, although he didn't sleep as much as he should have, he slept pretty well at night...even the night of the ants. I'll leave that one to the imagination, but I will say IT WAS GROSS!!

He loved taking a bath in the dish tub and he amazed all of us with his gymnastics. Imagine a baby sitting in a dish tub splashing away and then he starts to pull himself up he loses his balance and, instead of spilling out of the tub onto his head, his little arms catch the side and he holds himself completely suspended above the water, legs outstretched like this (except his little body was naked, his form wasn't as good, and he didn't look as mean...more frightened): It was pretty amazing that, inspite of the fact that there were two cameras snapping away, no pictures were taken of this spectacle of strength. It was amazing and hilarious.

He looks quite a lot like Ilan when he was little. The main differences are coloring - Ilan had red hair and fairer skin, wheras Aitan has always been a bit darker. His hair has lightened quite a bit, but he more light brown than anything and is much longer than Ilan's was at this age. Aitan's skin is more olive colored. At the Dodger game the other day I received several comments about his eyes being "Dodger Blue." Aitan has the shape of my eyebrows, but definitely Scott's eye shape and Bob's (Scott's dad) eye color. I would say Ilan is the opposite - Scott's eyebrows, my eyes. Sometimes when I see Scott holding Aitan the similarity between them is remarkable. I'm pretty sure both Ilan and Aitan have a Vaccaro nose, but baby noses are a little hard to tell.

We're finding our groove and we're having a good time. This is a really fun age...even if he thinks it's a fun game to hid his paci...

Nicknames: Baby A, Aitanovich, Kurmunchkin, Kurmunchily

Gravity

2010-05-27T15:19:00.000-07:00

Just thought I would update you on the growth of our plant. Gravity is taking effect.

Baby A

2010-05-22T01:05:00.000-07:00

Aitan has started crawling the right way and basically cannot be stopped! I think we are going to have our hands full with this child. We've already caught him with a variety of foreign substances in his mouth...some of which are still unidentified, he pulls up on everything and scoots about with true purpose, and he is so fascinated by the electrical outlets. This is a video I took of him the other day at Jumpin' and Jammin'. Before too many of the big kids arrived I took him on the big play structure and he worked it:

I am amazed at how social my kids are. They love people. The other day when we had them dedicated at church, the pastor was praying and Aitan got into the face of the man next to me and started making caveman-like inquiries - you know, grunting with a questioning sound. He was trying to make eye contact with him. It's pretty cute, but it also makes getting him to bed really hard. This evening as he was well beyond bed time and super tired he just sat there looking up at me and smiling the sweetest smile. I couldn't help but smile back.

A Mother's Day Gift

2010-05-22T01:00:00.000-07:00

This is the little pot that Ilan planted for me for Mother's Day in his Community Bible Study class. He was so sad when the pot, packaged in a ziplock bag, took a spill in the car. I told him I would try to get it all back in and we'd see if the plant grows. I watered it and then we left for Palm Springs. I figured it had a pretty slim chance of survival 1) considering I didn't know if I actually got the seed back into the pot after the spill and 2) we were gone all week without watering it. So, when I came home there were two leaves on the plant and in the week we've been home more have grown.

They look to me like nasturtium, which is nice because they are such a happy and bright flower. Let's hope they last!!

The Zebra Shirt

2010-05-22T00:45:00.000-07:00

I didn't know back when I bought my red thrift store shirt with zebras on it (that I bought while thrifting with Marnie and that may have once been a pajama top) that it would ever be used by one of my children to manipulate me. That's right, folks. I said manipulate. This morning, as I dawned my aforementioned shirt (which goes particularly well with my new bangs), Ilan tugged on my sleeve and in such a pathetic voice asked me: "Ima, can I watch Madagascar since you're wearing a shirt with zebras on it?" My child, of course you can watch Madagascar because I am in awe of your ability to use the circumstances to your advantage. Because it is such a brilliant request that I can't help but give you your way. Please, my child, watch Madagascar and I will post lines from the movie on facebook as they strike me particularly humorous.

Me in the zebra shirt with my new bangs:

Cruisin

2010-05-16T21:13:00.000-07:00

Well, Aitan still hasn't gotten the crawl down, but is showing much more interest in pulling up on everything in sight (and when nothing is there to pull up on he just does a little yoga - down dog style). Yes, he is curious about everything and is on the move. He watched Ilan go up the stairs at my parents and then started up himself. He certainly is determined and I think he is going to be into a lot more than Ilan was.

He is used to our hardwood floors that aid his belly crawl by providing a smooth surface to glide upon. While we were on vacation he developed a rug burn on his knees and left forearm, which bears most of his weight during the army crawl. But, like his brother, he gets around pretty quickly with the silly little crawl. It reflects something both in Scott and my personality. Lord knows I am not a perfectionist. If I am doing something and having good results I couldn't give a hoot about whether my technique is right. Scott is a little different, but especially in things athletic where he may lack in finesse he makes up in force. So, combine the two and you have two kids who don't crawl right, but get the job done just as well. At this point it looks like Aitan may walk even earlier than Ilan did.

I remember finding this stage much more amusing when Ilan was a baby. So sad, now I just find it frustrating when I go into the boys room to find Aitan's pacifier on the ground and Aitan either standing up or laying on his tummy looking at it on the ground and whining. Hoping and praying my humor changes because I want to enjoy these boys as much as I can!

Strawberry Short Kook and Poncho Punch

2010-05-14T21:52:00.001-07:00

While in Palm Springs this week, Ilan was introduced to a favorite childhood summer treat: the Otter Pop. Who are we kidding? When Scott saw the box he recited which colors were his favorite and I knew Poncho Punch was my man. We threw some in the freezer and Scott kept checking to see if they were ready, nevermind that these were meant to be a hydrating treat for Ilan on hot days. So, Ilan, Papa, Abba and Ima enjoyed them and we will continue to enjoy our Costco-sized box of them all summer.

Donuts

2010-05-05T11:46:00.000-07:00

It's D week. That is, the week and Ilan is learning about the letter D in the Nassau pre-school. So, we took a little excursion to the Farmer's Market to get none other than Bob's Donuts. Documented below.

The Little Man Cave

2010-05-04T15:00:00.000-07:00

Yesterday Scott and I packed up the boys and made a trip to IKEA to get some things to organize the apartment. We purchased a few items to help with our cupboards, but in the end what we really succeeded in doing is pimping Ilan and Aitan's room.

Scott was very disturbed that Ilan didn't actually have a bed - just a mattress on a frame, and wanted to get something for him. So, when we saw this little boy size loft with what amounts as space for a cave underneath it was hard to resist. Add a table, a couple stools, a roll of paper and, last but not least, a carpet that is a little town with streets to drive his cars around and this room is set. Instead of Ilan coming into our room and waking us up first thing this morning, I heard the klink of car wheels on the floor.

In other news Aitan's second tooth has broken through, but he still hasn't mastered crawling (as can be evidenced in the picture below). He keeps getting closer and closer, but truly seems more interested in pulling up when he can.

The Forbidden Reef

2010-04-24T09:35:00.000-07:00

Scott had a conference in San Diego earlier this week and so we tagged along and headed to Sea World. We went on Monday and Ilan was super fascinated by the stingray exhibit. One of my highlights as a child was feeding the dophins, so when I saw that you could feed them I wanted to give Ilan that experience. On Tuesday I went with the boys by myself and decided to go for it. The only issue is that I did not anticipate what a challenge it would be. Not so much because of the boys, but because of the birds. I was taking pictures with my iphone and ended up snapping a shot just as a bird swooped down to grab a fish from Ilan's hand. It was at that point I asked the guy working there to run interference. Hold a child, take pictures, help a child feed sting rays and keep birds away are even beyond my multi-tasking skills.

Someone's standing

2010-04-23T20:30:00.000-07:00

Aitan is still not crawling, per se, but he is doing the army crawl and making his way around. I sat him on the ground by the piano this afternoon and went to do something. When I came back he was kneeling and I thought I'd turn the video camera on to see what happened next. Sorry for the lame commentary and the silly outfit. We had just come back from the park and I just grabbed whatever hat to keep the sun off his face.

I'm choosing the wind

2010-04-22T21:07:00.000-07:00

There are a few things that have been stirring around in my head lately and I can't really figure out where to start when writing, so forgive me if this is rough. I've been feeling really frustrated lately and have found myself muttering curse words a whole lot. I mean, the s word may come out every now and then but I have been saying the f word a whole lot. Jesus said out of the heart the mouth speaks, so this has really got me thinking about what's going on in there. It seems to be a constant theme among moms that we often lose ourselves in the process of raising children and I had a bit of an epiphany while we were going to the park today.

Ilan was riding his tricycle and I was pushing Aitan in his little car. About every 10 feet Ilan stopped for one reason or the other and I started to get really irritated. It is normal for a little boy to stop while on a bike ride and investigate things around him, maybe run into a few things and ask for a parking ticket, and smell the proverbial roses. Totally normal. But it is so against my personality to stop and meander when I am trying to go somewhere, the park in this case.

In January we were part of an assessment for Vision 360 and we had to do a whole bunch of personality profile tests. It was one of the hardest things to do because I saw a true dichotomy - the working Dana who is structured, organized, and efficient and the stay-at-home mom Dana who flows on the wind and can't get her act together. How can both of these people exist in the same person? How do I explain which one is more me?

So, the frustration comes when I am trying to get things done in an orderly fashion and I have thought through my strategy (and if you don't believe maneuvering with two kids through errands and play dates and chores and naps requires strategy you are wrong) and none of it goes according to plan or my plans are outright foiled!!! I am a smart person who knows how to make things happen. I can reach goals that I set for myself, but for some reason I can't get ahead as a mom. I can clean all day but the house is never clean - if it's not dishes, floors and laundry, someone is spilling or peeing where they shouldn't. I can cook great food, but I can't get someone to eat it. I talk all day and it feels like no-one is listening to me and when I just need a moment of silence I am bombarded by questions.

I have been trying to keep up my activities with the kids because I didn't want to be one of those moms who stopped living, but I think I may be trying to do too much with the boys. So, I'm lowering the bar for myself. If it's going to cause me so much frustration, maybe going to the gym for the next year will have to wait, maybe I'll just have to miss an activity or two because the baby is sleeping, and maybe I'll just have to say no or let someone else pick up the slack a little more often. I'd rather spend time with the boys enjoying them than getting frustrated about how difficult it is to get things done with them in tow. Because a simple trip to the store with two kids is rarely simple.

So this is organized and efficient Dana signing off. Maybe I'll see you in a few years when the boys are older and we've had our fill of rose smelling.

Mr. Contrary

2010-04-16T14:58:00.000-07:00

Ilan, we have discovered, is quite the clown. The other day at church the children's director told me that Ilan played dead, laying on the ground completely still and stoic and then hopped up laughing. He was very impressed. At Karate he's making faces in the mirror and instead of giving the teacher high 5, he gives him a high head.

One thing that really tickles him is putting his clothes on backwards. I don't know why, but doing the opposite of what he knows he is supposed to do really excites him - not in a rebellious way, but in a he he that's the wrong way kind of way. He picks out his own wardrobe most days and puts his clothes on by himself. Not always does he put things on backwards, but this week has been a big backwards week. And, believe me, it's not that he doesn't know how to put things on the right way. He likes things backwards! On Wednesday I had so many people comment on his pants being on backward, but I've decided not to fight him on this one because it's really something so minor and if it makes him happy, well, you know.

Toothbrushes and Rabbit Trails

2010-04-15T22:36:00.000-07:00

I'm sure any married person has at some point wondered what would happen if their husband or wife died. It's morbid, but when you see loss, it's sometimes hard not to wonder how you would respond. How would you care for the kids, would you ever be able to move on, what types of things would come up that you didn't even realize they took care of? Could you manage without him or her?

Well, as I was brushing my teeth this evening the battery on my electric toothbrush died. I was only halfway through and so I completed the task manually. It may sound strange, but I never pay attention to the charge on my toothbrush because Scott always switches it. I suppose its just a little nicety on his part, I mean, it's not like I can't switch the toothbrush. But he takes care of it. He's been traveling a lot lately so he didn't get to it in time. Made me think about the morbid question...what else would happen like that.

So, instead of dwelling or dark thoughts, I just wanted to send a shout out to my "Babe." Thanks for all the things you do, and especially all the things you do that I don't know you do. I'd be lost without you.

Spiderman

2010-04-13T21:04:00.000-07:00

In case you didn't know, Ilan is totally obsessed with Spiderman, as in he wants to be Spiderman "when he grows up." I apologize if none of this is new to you, but I'm covering all my bases, here. (Facebook has made me a lazy blogger.) I'm trying to think through any exposure Ilan might have had and I think the first was a ball we got him in Israel. We didn't get it because it was spiderman, we got it because it was a ball and apparently the price was right. I do remember him asking about it, but it was out of context and didn't lure him in.

Next exposure: spiderman slippers. I think he saw these in the department store and recognized spiderman. So, they were given to him as a present by my mom, I think.

A year or so passes...

The next exposure was a little more dramatic...he was at Oma and Opas and Opa let him watch a little bit of the movie before he realized that it really isn't for kids. But Ilan saw enough to know what Spiderman does and who he is when he's not Spiderman. I would say this is the clincher, because it's been a growing fascination from this point.

Ilan has developed sound effects to use when he casts a web and he's totally got the wrist flick down. But he's not the only one with the obsession. Almost any boy he plays has the same obsession. At a friend's birthday party three boys his age had their faces painted like Spiderman. Jackson likes him, the boy from the park does...it's a little strange to me.

If Ilan falls, he's okay because he's spiderman...he climbs and won't fall because he's spiderman. I think it disturbes his identity when Scott and I tell him not to climb on the furniture or the railing or our neighbor's window...I mean, who is spiderman if he is not a climber? Scott was at Jumpin' Jammin' the other day with Ilan and he overheard the girl he was playing with ask what his name was. Scott assumed the answer was Ilan, but then herd the girl shouting "spiderman!" across the room to get his attention. He has been known to correct me when I call him Ilan..."No, Ima. Call me Spidey."

But this last little conversation takes the cake. Ilan and I were driving down the freeway and it was quiet then Ilan pipes up: Ima, I'm going to be spiderman when I grow up. Can you tell God?
Me: Well, we can ask God.
Ilan: Okay, let's do it.
Me: God, can you help Ilan to be like spider man when he grows up, to help people who have trouble and to help bring justice?
Ilan: Can you ask for me to have a web and webs that come from my hands?
Me: (silence)
Ilan: Say it!

His First Obsession

2010-04-13T20:51:00.001-07:00

Aitan is on the verge of crawling...he gets his knees up and rocks. He even will move an arm forward, but just can't quite get those knees forward. It frustrates him so much. He tries and cries out and then tries again. I know it's haunting him because he'll roll over when he's going to bed and get up on his knees and try and then cry because he is really tired and just wants to sleep. He seems so tired, but he just can't stop trying. He's not even really eating because he's so obsessed.

Life has changed, though. Yesterday I was reminded (by the dark grey his sleeves turned after he had been scooting around on the floor) that I need to do a better job of keeping up with the floors.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

He has a tooth

2010-04-04T14:22:00.000-07:00

Someone has his first tooth!! It's the bottom left one and it's about time! For the last three months Scott and I have been blaming his poor sleep on the immanent arrival of a tooth. I'm not sure that's what the problem has been, but at least he has a tooth now.

This picture is posted in memory of Aitan's cute little blue fisherman's hat that blew away on our walk the other day. Didn't even see it come off! Looked for it and didn't find it anywhere. So sad. Loved that little hat.

On the move

2010-04-01T09:33:00.000-07:00

At Brooklynn's party yesterday, Aitan seemed very interested in the cupcakes. So, interested he started moving to get to them. This isn't a crawl yet, but it does resembles Ilan's crawl. We'll see if it changes, but there is one thing that has changed for sure: Aitan is mobile.

Take a hike

2010-03-25T20:05:00.000-07:00

My brother is in town with his dog, Rosie. Ilan was so sad on Monday because he wanted to play with them. So, we convinced Matt to head out west to take a hike with us at Ken Hahn State Recreation Area.

Ilan by the "river."

Couldn't resist this picture of Aitan. That pretty much sums up Aitan's personality at the moment - curious and curiouser.

I am always the one taking the pictures and am never in them unless I take a self portrait. Geez I look old.

Ilan and Rosie. She's a "licker dog," as Ilan likes to say. She likes to surprise him and lay one on him when he's not expecting it...which he thinks is hilarious! He kept trying to get her interested in a stick, but there were too many birds to distract her.

I don't think you can tell how steep this slope is, but it was pretty much a straight shot up the hill. Ilan trucked along and only stopped when he saw his Ima (disguised as a pack animal) panting for breath. At one point along the ridge he got excited and went running down a little hill too fast and took a dive, but he was "okay, because I'm spider man."

Strawberry Fields Forever

2010-03-25T18:51:00.000-07:00

So, I'm a little obsessed with picking strawberries. I did it once as a child and it made a big impression. I can still remember the place near my grandparents, which is now covered in new homes. So, last year a few of us went to Cal Poly Pomona to pick strawberries and they were amazing! Imagine a whole 2 lbs of strawberries that were perfectly ripe when you picked them. It's hard to beat. So, I've been a little anxious about the season starting this year. On a whim last week my father-in-law and I took the boys to Tanaka Farms to pick them. Although it's a little pricey, the tour is so much fun and it's the only time Ilan eats vegetables without extreme coaxing.

So I've joined a meetup group called Mothers I'd Like to Know (MILK) here in LA and I suggested a meetup at Underwood Farms. I'd never been before and it was a cute little place with lots of animals and ways to spend money. The best part, though, was the u-pick strawberries and veggies. The strawberries weren't quite ready yet, but we did pick some spinach, carrots, beets, cauliflower and bibb lettuce. I walked away with a pound of strawberries, 1 lb spinach, about 5 small beets, about 5 very small carrots, the smallest head of cauliflower I've ever seen, celery, the lettuce and 2 heads of fennel for less than $10. Not too shabby! Here are some pics of the boys.

PS - I still plan to make several trips to the Kellogg Farm Store this spring, so let me know if you'd like to join me.

A glimpse into my life

2010-03-25T16:51:00.000-07:00

We pulled into the Costco parking lot and Ilan started asking about samples. Yesterday at Trader Joe's they ran out of the sample by the time we got to the sample counter and we had to wait for them to make more. So, he was especially concerned that they would run out of samples before we got to try them. He wanted to go straight to the samples, so we wouldn't miss them.

Aitan had sounded like he might have been pooping on the way over, so I wanted to change him right away. Although, by the time I found a cart, loaded Ilan and the diaper bag, put Aitan in the sling and found my Costco card I forgot. So we started browsing the aisles and then I remembered. Fortunate for Ilan there was a sample of orange sherbet at the end of the aisle, so we grabbed one on the way to the potty.

Ilan wasn't finished with his sherbet, so I made him wait until he was finished. Changing station was in the handicapped bathroom, which had a toilet that didn't work. So, I changed Aitan's diaper and then took Ilan into a different stall to go pee. We washed hands and then I loaded Ilan back into the cart. We shopped. Ilan ate his way through the store. We bought things we probably shouldn't have including these cashew clusters that are really amazing.

We check out and I decided I would write a check, which I haven't done in a store in ages. Aitan was fighting with me for the checkbook (one of the down-sides of wearing your baby) and I ended up writing the wrong amount on the written part. So, I wrote another check and we went outside to grab a piece of pizza.

It wasn't too crowded, so I took the cart over to a table and told Ilan to sit down while I got my drink. Of course, I turned around every other second to keep my eye on him. My receipt flew away and I decided to let it go...I just couldn't see myself chasing after a receipt blowing in the wind, while wearing a baby and trying to keep an eye on my other child. What would I need it for anyway? Ilan stayed seated, but not on the bench - in the puddle underneath the table. I wasn't going back inside so hand sanitizer it was. We shared a piece of pizza and all the while Aitan was trying to grab it out of my hand. The wind was blowing and actually blew the plate away when I picked up the pizza. Aitan burned his hand on it and I knocked Ilan's over onto my leg and the sling. Aitan followed every bite I took with his eyes. Poor guy. Ilan ate the cheese and some of the crust.

We were just about back to the car when Ilan announced that he had to poop. Okay. Oh dang...the receipt. I just explained to the guy as I re-entered (through the exit) that I had to take my son to the bathroom. He looked at me funny and let me through. I didn't really know what to do with my cart. If I had not paid for the items I would leave it outside, but I had already paid and I had the diaper bag in it, so I decided it was coming in the bathroom with us. Ilan poops. I wipe his bottom. We load back in the cart and head for the door. The lady stopped me and I explained why I didn't have my receipt. The guy who let me in was walking away and she had to snag him to verify my story.

I take Aitan out of the sling and strap him in his seat. I take Ilan out of the cart and strap him in his seat. I unload the cart, place it in the return and get in the car. Both boys fall asleep on the way home.

Update on the Boys

2010-03-10T10:55:00.001-08:00

Aitan had his six month appointment with the doctor on March 2nd. He was 27 1/4 (75%) inches and 15 lbs 12 oz (25%). He continues to be a sweet, happy little guy, even though he's not sleeping well. It seems like his sleep has been getting worse and worse since the holidays. I think we've been moving him around too much, plus the move was hard on him. Now, I'm pretty sure we're teething. Still no signs of teeth, but lots and lots of drool. We've also recently stopped swaddling him, which was a harder adjustment than I anticipated. He keeps startling himself and waking up. I am so thankful for the ring sling (www.zolowear.com). Aitan sleeps really well in it and it allows me to get Ilan out of the house. It's not ideal, but at least I know if I have to get out Aitan will still be able to get a little sleep. Poor guy.

Aitan is super social and loves to watch and smile at people. He gave a big smile to the cashier at Trader Joes the other day. She said it made her feel so special. He is mostly sitting up be himself with a few spills here and there. Ilan and I have both learned to keep our hair out of his reach because he has a tight grip and pulls hard!

Ilan is doing more and more by himself. He often picks out his clothes and dresses himself. A personal favorite of his is to put his pants on backwards. Give him a stool and he'll find his way into anything that he's after. He is a natural with the computer. We rented "where the wild things are" from itunes and watched it one night. The next morning he wanted to watch it, but Scott told him to wait and he would put it on when he got out of bed. Well, I was the next one to get up and found Ilan laying down on the sofa watching the movie. He had found it and started it on his own. I made the mistake of putting some kids games on my iphone and now I have to keep it password protected so he doesn't get on it and start moving things around.

I've decided not to enroll Ilan in pre-school this year. I would only have done it for a couple of days a week, butit is sooooo expensive out on the west side. I am part of Community Bible Study and they have an excellent children's program, that would give him the same type of experiences as pre-school and I've decided I can supplement with other 'extra-curricular activities" and activities at home. So, I took Ilan to a trial karate class yesterday. He was the youngest kid - most of the other boys are turning 5, but he did a really good job. When I woke him up from his nap and asked if he was ready to go to Karate class he gave me a karate chop and said hiyah! On the way there he asked if he was going to be able to chop a wood board, but I told him he was going to have to wait for that one. Anyway, I'm really excited about this and I think it will be great for him.

I'll put some pictures up at another time.

Precious Moments

2010-03-06T08:47:00.001-08:00

The other morning Ilan crawled into bed with us around 6:00, just after I nursed Aitan. So, there we were, Scott, Ilan, Aitan and me. I couldn't fall back to sleep (for obvious reasons, least of which was the lack of space), so I just watched my boys. There's something so sweet about watching your children sleep. The blurr of activity is gone, they have no questions to be answered. They have no needs to be attended to. They are just peaceful and beautiful. At these times my heart wells up with love and without distraction I can appreciate their contribution to my life. I wanted to take a picture: Scott laying with his elbow on Ilan, Ilan with his on Aitan, Aitan with his on me. It was precious, but not as much as the moment of silence I might have disturbed if I did take the picture.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

This is how you know you are a Nassau

2010-02-13T12:04:00.000-08:00

We're not kidding anyone. The Nassaus, as in the whole bunch of us, are not punctual people. Generally, if I am without Scott I manage pretty well, but as a team I would say we are almost always late. Before kids it had gotten better, but really, who is on time after kids? It's a family trait. Some of us have married into it, others have come by it honestly, but it is what it is. My sister-in-law and I joked about Aitan being on Nassau Time when he was 5 days late. So to give you a glimpse of how this kind of thing happens I thought I would share how this morning proceeded:

Scott looked at his watch and said "Oh, I need to leave in 15 minutes." So, he got up and did something and then sat back down and chatted for a minute. He then looked at his watch and said "Oh, I have to leave in 3 minutes." He then pulled out the ironing board to iron his shirt. And when I heard the shower running a few minutes later I said "I thought you needed to leave a few minutes ago." Scott, still in his boxers, said "I'm getting in the car," and then proceeded to take a shower. I had to laugh.

This is why when I ask Scott if he is ready and he says he is we used to have trouble. Apparently, ready, could mean "as soon as I take a shower and get dressed I will be ready." Incidentally, I've stopped asking him, expecting a truthful answer. Now the ask is more of a reminder that he needs to focus on getting ready.

Sorry to out you babe. I just couldn't help it. "I'm getting in the car!"

Baby update

2010-02-10T22:16:00.000-08:00

Aitan has discovered the joys of his jumpy chair and could sit in it for hours, I'm sure. He just squeals and jumps and coos. Ilan likes to "swing" him in the jumpy chair, which can be a bit of an exercise in faith on my part. But as long as he doesn't pull the chair too far back before he lets go Aitan seems to enjoy it. When the jumpy chair is not around Aitan will bounce on your lap. The kid just loves to jump!

Aitan likes us all, but he really loves his brother. Ilan seems to be growing fonder of Aitan, too. He always wants to give him a kiss before we put him in his bed and for some reason asks "if I give him three kisses will he go to sleep?" Some nights we let Ilan start off in our bed it has happened on several occasions when Aitan starts to stir we will go in to see Ilan rocking his co-sleeper or giving him his pacifier. It's very sweet.

I was going to wait until 6 months to give Aitan solids, but I could't bear to watch him follow the food from plate to mouth with his eyes anymore. So, I gave in and let me tell ya, the kid loves to eat!! He squeals between bites if we make him wait at all. So far he has had banana, avocado, carrot, apples, sweet potato, green beans, beets, broccoli, spinach, pears, cauliflower, kiwi, and lima beans.

I love it

2010-02-01T09:54:00.000-08:00

I think I am guilty of facebooking so many of things I would formerly blog about and turn into a little story. There's no story with this one, but I just wanted to say how much I love it when a baby is about to nurse how they get all excited and start panting. I just love it. They grow up so fast. sigh.

Busted

2010-01-25T21:38:00.000-08:00

Well, we're back to apartment living and already we've had our first call from the manager. That's right...apparently one of our neighbors has complained about Ilan's pattering feet on the hardwood floors. This is something I have been sensitive to because it really is loud and I'm afraid he'll wake up Aitan. I didn't realize how often he patters until we received the call from the manager and I have been on watch for it. Wow. It just seems impossible to stop him. I told him a lie and it was a little mean, but I just don't know how to get through to him that he has to walk gently. I told him the neighbor may make him move out if he isn't more quiet with his feet. It's mean and it's frightening and it's still not working. My next effort will be to win over our neighbors so that they'll learn to not be so irritated by it. We'll do what we can, but part of living in an apartment is dealing with other people's noise, right?

Our new home

2010-01-23T22:46:00.000-08:00

We've been in our new place for almost a week and have so enjoyed unpacking, re-discovering all of our things and making a home for ourselves. On this side of our move from Dallas we see what a poor job we did packing. It makes me wonder if we hadn't been a little more deliberate whether we would have been able to fit a few more things in the moving van instead of flagging people down by the mailboxes to see if they want a tv, desk, papasan...

We have been adjusting really well. Ilan loves his new "department" and has been showing so many positive behavioral changes and just maturity in general, if you can say that about a 3-year-old. Aitan is not adjusting as well and has really been having trouble going to sleep. As I write this (almost 11:00 PM) he is sitting beside me playing on his play mat. After trying for too long to put him to sleep, I finally gave up. I really have no idea what to do.

Scott was solicited to turn on a light for an orthodox woman Friday night. Instead of doing the work to turn on the light she had to do much more work to find a shabbos goy willing to come turn on her light for her. We also saw his twin at Schwartz Bakery on Wednesday morning. Same haircut. Same scruffy beard. Same Banana Republic sweater. It was strange. We enjoyed our first Shabbat dinner with friends and had Jachnun for breakfast. We've been here for less than a week and have already had several people from our emerging community over. All this to say that we like it here and believe this is exactly where God wants us. So, come join us for Shabbat!

I'll post some pics once we're settled in a bit more.

long time no blog

2010-01-06T14:11:00.001-08:00

Well, let's see. The holidays have come and gone and it seems like we're getting back into a bit of a routine. This was the first year Ilan has had something that he really wanted and so it was fun getting him his marble set.

In other news Aitan started rolling over yesterday. At his 4 month visit he had grown 5 1/4 inches (26 1/4 total) and weighs 14 lbs. Mock all you'd like, but I am trying Elimination Communication (EC) with him and he's doing really well. Basically what it amounts to is that I put him on the little potty (http://www.toysrus.com/product/prodpop.jsp?LargeImageURL=http%3A//TRUS.imageg.net/graphics/product_images/pTRU1-2890618dt.jpg&displayTab=enh&productId=2322186&totCount=0) every time I change his diaper or when I think he has to go to the bathroom. Usually if I hear a gurgle in his tummy I can catch a poop, which is great because it really makes cloth diapering easy!! Lately I've been catching most of his poops. And when you have a boy who messes his clothes 90% of the time when he poops, you know how much easier getting him on the potty is!! So far so good.

Finally, we are moving out of my parents house!!! We have signed a lease for a cute little place in the Pico-Robertson area of Los Angeles. It's not exactly the west side, but it is a great location for us and will help us avoid some of the congestion from the 405. Plus we'll be surrounded by Israeli markets and kosher bakeries!!

Brothers at just under 3 months

2009-12-03T22:43:00.000-08:00

Fall in California

2009-11-15T11:01:00.001-08:00

Okay, so fall in California consists of a few overnight temps in the 40's, pumpkins, and the changing of the liquid amber. So, when you have liquid amber in your yard, and you are a three year old boy, this is how you celebrate fall...

Halloween

2009-11-07T15:21:00.000-08:00

I forgot to post a picture of Scott in his dragon costume for halloween...

The Eyeball Song

2009-11-06T22:02:00.000-08:00

Scott was at a conference this evening and my parents were out playing Bingo, so I promised I would take Ilan to the play place. Traffic was really bad so we had plenty of time to sing songs. Ilan requested the eyeball song. You know: The B-L-I-E. Yes, that's the girl for me. Stand alone. Word of God. the B-L-I-E. EYEBALL!

It really doesn't matter how many times I tried to tell him it was BIBLE...the boy just loves to shout EYEBALL!

Halloween

2009-11-04T19:28:00.000-08:00

This year we went to the festival at Opa and Oma's church for Halloween and then we went trick or treating. It was pretty hard to get a good picture of Ilan in his Dragon costume because he was too busy playing, but here are a few...

Opa in his "wedding costume" as Ilan called it. Actually he is Charlie Chaplan.

My Tigers

2009-11-04T19:22:00.000-08:00

Aitan in the Halloween tiger costume

Ilan in the Halloween tiger costume

7 Weeks

2009-10-19T21:57:00.000-07:00

Aitan turned 7 weeks today. Everyone says it, but it still is amazing how quickly the little ones grow. He's become much more alert when he's awake and started smiling last week. He's very interested by his big brother, but really doesn't like it when big brother places pillows over him and wants to build a cave for him.

Juxtaposition

2009-10-13T15:04:00.000-07:00

I've received a broad spectrum of comments about the boys and whether they look alike or nothing alike. These pictures are taken at about the same point in life. What do you think?

You know what?

2009-10-13T14:29:00.000-07:00

Ilan and I have a little game we play...it's not really a game, but it's just one of the ways I like to tell him that I love him. It used to be that I would ask him "You know what?" and he would say "What?" and I'd say "I love you."

As he got older it turned into me asking him "You know what?" and he'd say "Yes." and I'd say "What?" and he'd say "I love you."

We haven't played this little game in a while and so yesterday when I asked him "You know what?" he said "What?" and I said "I love you." Then he said "You know what?" and I said "What?" and he said "I love you." I replied "I love you, too." Then he said "You know what?" and I said "What?" and he said "I love baby brother." (who, by the way, goes by brother, baby brother and least often Aitan) He then continued to list all of his loved ones in no particular order...Abba, Nana, Papa, Opa, Oma, Nina...

State of the Factory

2009-09-12T21:22:00.000-07:00

Who needs a Moses basket?

Aitan had his 1 month check up this week. He weighed 9 lbs, 10 oz and was 21 3/4 inches. He's a great eater and sleeper. We're finding these things, in combination with the fact that he does not have health problems and that we're already used to being parents has made the transition a lot easier. Living with my parents we have a lot of support and that makes the biggest difference, I'm sure. I have to admit I feel a little guilty because I'm not really experiencing the chaos that I should be. Don't get me wrong. I am very thankful, but I feel like I am missing out on a rite of passage or something. I know, I need to get over it and just be thankful that I have the help.

The temperature has cooled off and the smoke from the fires has ceased to be an issue, so we've been able to get out to the park and have some playdates, which has been good for Ilan. Some of his regular play-date friends are in pre-school now, so we'll have to find some other ways to fill our time, or make some new friends. Ilan continues to be sweet and curious about the baby and a little ornery when it comes to the rest of us, but I guess that's part of being three. All-in-all I think he's handled the adjustment very well. There have been some rough spots, but we're managing.

I probably tried to do too much too soon (read a Brit Milah and a Birthday Party within two weeks of his birth), but am finally feeling like I am on top of things. Even being in recovery from childbirth and sleep deprived I felt like I had so much more energy than I did when I was pregnant. I don't think I realized how tired I was!

Now I have lots of laundry to do with my extra energy! Aitan is a spitter...he nurses then he spits up. It's a fact of life. I sometimes wonder if my boys are trying to see if we can go for a record amount of laundry done each day. Aitan's skinny little legs leave a lot of room in both cloth and paper diapers for leakage, so we have at least one to two clothes changes due to that each day, spit-up might account for another clothes change or at least a bib change and maybe a burp cloth or two, then usually I get an outfit change due to the spit up. At least laundry is a chore I don't mind doing.

Do babies have teeth?

2009-09-09T17:11:00.000-07:00

Ilan was born to parents who are never wrong. Hem. Well, at least we never like to be wrong. There have been many an occasion where Scott and I have sought third party confirmation of our correctness in an argument with each other. Of course one of us has to be wrong, but even if we are we have good reason for thinking we were right. If you've been around long enough I'm sure you have experienced such an argument first-hand.

It is no surprise, then, that our older son is also never wrong. There have been occasions when he tells me I am driving the wrong way to our destination and when I disagree with him it ends in him shouting at me that I need to go the other way. So, a couple weeks before Aitan was born Ilan and I ended up in a discussion about whether or not babies have teeth. I told him that babies are born without teeth and they get teeth one at a time as they get older. He disagreed with my answer and told me that babies DO have teeth. As we disagreed further he finally conceded that only some babies have teeth.

It was either the night Aitan was born or when Ilan came to visit us the next morning that he asked me "Does he have teeth?" He saw for himself that his brother was born without teeth, confirming what I had told him. Even though I was right, somehow gloating in my correctness doesn't seem as fun with a 3-year old.

The Birth Story

2009-09-03T18:06:00.000-07:00

Childbirth is probably one of the least predictable things that occurs in the life of a woman. There is almost nothing you predict about it, except that at the end you will have a child. I know this. But it is so much in my nature to plan for things that there were some assumptions that I made about Aitan's birth and there were a lot of surprises along the way...as it probably should be.

I felt like this birth was a bit of an experiment for me. Ilan's birth experience was so positive that I couldn't imagine doing it in a different setting with different care providers. I had a wonderful midwife in Texas, that I trusted so thoroughly, and I just couldn't imagine finding that bond with someone else. I researched my options and chose a doctor that supports natural childbirth, even though my first choice would have been the midwives at UCLA. Knowing how I felt about car rides the first time around I didn't want to take that chance with an hour (or longer) drive to Brentwood. Dr. Dwight is a very kind man and I knew I could trust him to take the best care of me, while giving me a voice in my birth experience, but I never could get past the medical model of care that a doctor will provide. It's just different than a midwife and I am not sure I can put all of the differences into words, but when you view childbirth as a medical event or procedure as opposed to a natural process for a woman's body things turn out differently. So, while I knew he would support my choices assuming everything was fine, it was all that belonged in the realm outside of fine that worried me.

My first assumption about this birth is that it would probably happen right on time, if not early. After all, Ilan had been born a day past his due date and second-time moms usually go earlier, right? Well, childbirth myth #1 dispelled. I knew better, but you just want to believe that you'll be early and it didn't help that Dr. Dwight kept telling me he thought I'd be early. Five days after his due date Aitan made his entrance into the world and this is how it happened:

As with my pregnancy with Ilan, around the final month I started waking up really early in the morning. So, on Monday, August 31st, when I awoke at 5:00 am I noticed I was having regular contractions. Because I was "overdue" my doctor wanted me to come in regularly for non-stress tests. I had an appointment at 7:45 so I got up and ready and started putting my things together. I was positive that I was in labor, so Scott and I made plans with my mom as though we would not return home from my appointment. The NST was fine and I saw the doctor, who informed me that I was not in labor. You see, women don't go into labor during the day (myth #2)...after the appointment my contractions would trail off and I might go into labor that evening or the next day...or I may be back for my appointment on Wednesday. I listened to his words and then I followed my instincts which told me, I was in labor, albeit early labor.

Scott and I decided it would be good for me to walk, but it has been so hot and the whole area has been filled with smoke so we decided to go to the Glendale Galleria to walk around. We walked for several hours and the contractions grew in intensity and frequency. They were starting to get to the point that I couldn't look normal through them and I was starting to feel the need for a "base camp." Our options - go back home where my mom and Ilan were, go to my sister's condo that is temporarily without AC, or go to the hospital. None of them really appealed to me. We weren't ready for the hospital, but it would provide a private, cool place to labor. Again, not ideal.

As we checked in I explained to the nurse what our situation was. She put me on the monitor for 20 minutes and confirmed that I was "in labor." She brought me some ice and juice and basically left us alone, except to see if we needed anything once in a while. We spent the first 4 hours in the room chatting, playing cards and breathing through contractions, which were getting stronger and stronger.

My doctor came in at 5:00 to check on us. He did a vaginal exam and I was only 4 cm! What? He didn't think I should go home, but I was very discouraged.. All that work and only 4 cm. This was so different than my labor with Ilan, where I labored at home in peace until I was 6-7 cm. He offered to break my water, but I decided against it. I wanted things to go quickly, but I didn't want to look back with regret.

The doctor left and things intensified very quickly. Contractions were 1-2 minutes apart and really hard...harder than I remembered with Ilan. I was filled with self-doubt. As I labored in the shower I questioned whether I could do it and all the implications that would have on my work as a doula and Bradley Method instructor. But I continued to breath and sway and relax through the contractions. I was on the brink of exhaustion, but just could not handle contractions without moving through them so laying down was not an option.

The doctor came back in around 6:30 to check on me to see whether he should go home for dinner or stay there. I was expecting bad news. He did the vaginal exam and said that I should push on the next contraction. I was completely dilated and the frenzy began. We had been at the hospital for hours, but were not really checked in...the room was empty, we hadn't seen a nurse in two hours and nothing was set up. Things were hectic and all I remember was thinking "I don't have the urge to push!" In my birth plan I was very specific about the pushing part because I knew how calm and peaceful my birth was with Ilan when I was able to push instinctively. I wasn't ready mentally or emotionally and I didn't have an urge to push, but the pressure was on and it happened so quickly. I felt like a deer caught in the headlights.

With my first push my water broke and there was meconium in the fluid. I knew this meant that they would need to suction him and make sure he was okay before I could hold him. The pressure to push intensified. There I was flat on my back pushing and waiting for them to find a squatting bar, which arrived as Aitan was crowning. He was born at 6:55pm and was suctioned briefly before being returned to my chest. He latched on and breastfed right away. Our families joined us shortly afterward and Ilan was very excited to meet his baby brother.

I think the next morning I was still in shock from how quickly things happened once they got going. It may not have been the calm experience I was hoping for, but in the end we have Aitan and he's healthy. What else could we ask for? The name Aitan means strong in Hebrew. It is pronounced Ai=A (like the letter A) tan=tawn with emphasis on the second syllable. He is a sweet little guy who hardly fusses.

Ilan is adjusting fairly well. I know he is feeling a little left out and I am doing my best to be there for him while attending to the needs of an infant. We are very fortunate to have so much family so close who can give him special attention. He has been very sweet to Aitan and told me the other morning that he couldn't give me a kiss because he was saving all of them for his baby brother. We've had a few bumps in the road, but I am partially attributing that to the fact that we have been cooped up inside for a couple of weeks because of all the smoke from the Station fire.

A birthday note to my son

2009-08-24T06:34:00.001-07:00

Happy Birthday, sweet Ilan. This year has been full of so many changes for you. I've loved to watch you as a toddler with phrases like "Ima doing?" to a little boy who can hold conversations, use the potty like a big boy and loves to use his imagination! Yet, things are going to change even more for you this year. I am both excited to see you in your new role as a big brother and sad to lose the special relationship that we alone share. I know your little brother will just add to the love in our family and we will do everything possible to ease this transition for you. I'm sure you will do wonderfully.

My prayer for you is that you will continue to grow in compassion for others and that your strong personality will continue to be molded into godly leadership traits. I pray that you grow in the knowledge and understanding of God and that your Abba and I have wisdom and grace (which we need so much) to lead you on the correct path.

I love you so much!

Ima

The time has come

2009-08-20T14:37:00.000-07:00

Days away from Ilan's third birthday, and because Ima kept nagging to cut Ilan's hair so I can see his face, Abba finally agreed to a hair cut. For a child that runs and forces me to chase him around the house to brush his hair, he was very calm for the cut. I think it helped that he got to sit on a space ship.

Before:

With it all brushed out. My mom used a ruler to measure how long his hair was the other day: 8 inches.

After. Ilan wouldn't pose for me to take a picture of him so this is the best I have. I'm sure we'll have lots of birthday and baby pictures showing off his new do. I have to admit it is a little short for my taste, but it will grow out soon enough! And at least I can see his eyes!!!

Confessions

2009-08-14T11:17:00.000-07:00

Okay...yet another post about poop. You've been warned!

Last week I was at the park with Ilan when a boy of about 5 years walked into the sand box, pulled down his pants and peed right in the middle of it. Amazed and shocked I exclaimed, "Your son is peeing in the sandbox!" ...thinking that the mom might be concerned about her son's behavior. She rolled her eyes and kicked some sand over it and it was business as usual (except that I asked Ilan to avoid playing in the middle of the sandbox). I understand things happen and that as moms we don't always have control over our childrens' behavior, but as I try to put myself in that situation I just can't imagine Ilan, even at almost three years of age, getting off without a time out or some sort of talking to. There was a bathroom 15 yards away for goodness sake!

I should have known that my outrage over the incident would come back to bite me very soon. Just the very next morning on an early walk to see the turtles at CalTech I considered that there probably weren't any open buildings where Ilan could use the potty. As Ilan was climbing on the cannon in front of some of the dorms a security guard walked past so I figured I should ask him about it. "Sorry, ma'am, nothing is open. Your best bet is to let him use the bushes." I saw Ilan's eyes widen. "Ima, I have to go potty." As if he knew there was something really cool about peeing in public...as if it was part of the male birthright. So, into the bushes we trudged.

But the story does not stop here. As you know, poop has been the tough spot in this adventure. My instinct about when it is going to come is pretty flawless and so I made him sit on the toilet for a while before we left to visit Shannon and Josiah on Friday. No luck, but we made the trip to Claremont without incident. We decided to walk to a nearby park with a picnic lunch, but because we weren't bringing strollers and we were carrying food I decided to forgo the diaper bag.

Ilan and Josiah played and ate for a while, using most of the sample pack of wipes I had in my purse to clean up after the cherry mess. Then it happened. Ilan ran up shouting, "Ima! I have to go poopie!" No bathrooms at this park. What do I do? Can he poop in public? Choices: 1. Let him poop in his pants 2. Find a bush. Oh brother. There really is no good side to letting him poop in his pants. It doesn't "reward" him for telling me he has to poop or promote the cause of potty training and it certainly doesn't avoid a huge mess, which would require us to leave so we could clean it up. We ran across the park to the bushes away from all the action and there Ilan squatted and pooped. I wiped his bottom with the last diaper wipe and stuck the "business" into the diaper wipe package so I could throw it away. I mean, if people have to pick up after their dogs, really I should do the same. Right? More unfamiliar territory. Whew! Well, that wasn't sooo bad. A few minutes later..."Ima, I have to go poopie again!" This time big 37 week pregnant Ima isn't running to the other side of the park. Next to the trash can Ilan poops on a bed of pine needles. Using cherry covered, used diaper wipes, I wipe Ilan's bottom and stuff this "business" into the empty edamame container that I will not be taking home to recycle.

I am happy to report that this incident has apparently freed Ilan of his inhibitions and he is now pooping regularly again and even using the potty for poops in the nursery. I suppose the moral of the story is that we shouldn't judge other people's actions until we know the whole story. Because I truly would not want to be judged by the fact that my son has, in recent days, used the bathroom in public several times. Incidently, every time we have passed the spot where Ilan peed at CalTech he points it out and conveniently has to go potty again. Fortunately, we've been able to ask someone to let us in the dorm every time since.

A night at the ballgame

2009-08-05T13:10:00.000-07:00

Went to the ballgame last night with all of the bizarre things that happened...guy running on the field, Mota getting a base hit, and a score of 17 to 4. Fortunately it was the dodgers that won. Ilan had a great time eating his way through the game and guilting Abba into the acquisition of a foam finger.

Ilan got a little bored during the game so I let him take some pictures. These are a few of the highlights from his photo shoot. There were also several pictures of bodies minus the heads, water bottles, and the floor and ceiling of the stadium. My dad was given very nice tickets as you can see from the last picture.

Tanaka Farms

2009-08-05T12:59:00.000-07:00

I told my tale of potty training difficulty at Tanaka Farms, but I didn't share how cool it was at the farm. They pull you around the farm on trailers hitched to a big farm tractor and let you sample some of the things they grow that were picked earlier in the day. Ilan ate more vegetables in the space of an hour or so than he usually does in a normal week! We tried fresh radish, onion, tomatoes, carrots (he had 4), zucchini, cucumber, and watermelon. At the end of the tour Ilan got to select a watermelon to take home with him and we selected some items from the farmstand to take home, too. Unfortunately, this wasn't the beginning of a trend for Ilan. We bought a bunch of the carrots with the green still intact so he could snack on them at home, but I guess if he's not on a tractor it doesn't have the same appeal. Anyway, here are some photos from our trip. Thanks, Jen for the great idea!

Ilan with watermelon juice dripping from his face.

I get the fascination

2009-08-05T12:52:00.000-07:00

For Scott's birthday we went to see Fiddler on the Roof live with Chaim Topol playing the role he made famous in the movie version. It was wonderful. While we were out Nana and Papa babysat Ilan. We came home to find the house decorated the next morning:

It's a little surprising to see panty liners posted all over the house, but I have to say that I can understand why they would seem so cool to Ilan...In a way they are like big three dimensional stickers.

Potty Training Woes

2009-07-30T15:23:00.001-07:00

Warning: this post contains content that may not be suitable for non-parents or those with weak stomachs. Included is an in-depth look at the thought process of a potty-training mom.

There is a long list of things that I never imagined would be part of my job detail when I became a mom. After almost three years of semi-regular coverage in slobber, tears, spit-up, vomit and even poop, there isn't much that frightens me, but today I did have a first.

Ilan has been potty-training for just over a month and has done a great job. He's only wet the bed once during a nap, regularly wakes up dry in the morning, and only a few times has had a pee-pee miss when he's in underwear, but poop is another story. My theory is that he doesn't like to take the time to sit down and have a BM, so he waits and waits until he can't squeeze it back in and then it is URGENT! Since we've started potty training he's definitely reduced his BM frequency and this is the area where we have been having accidents.

It has been a couple days since he's pooped and I know he had a good deal of fruit yesterday, so I was a little concerned about our plans this morning and what it might mean for Ilan's BM. We have been planning to visit Tanaka farms with Jen and Sammy and were really looking forward to it. Certainly I can't cancel our plans because Ilan might need to poop and potty won't be available. Can I? No. So, we have an hour drive to Irvine, where the farm is located, and then we'll be on a tour of a farm. The availability of potties would be slim for sure. Before we left I tried to get Ilan to sit on the toilet and go poop to no avail. As I stated before if it is not imminent, it's just not going to happen. So, we had to move to plan B...pull-ups. At least if he has to poop he won't soil everything on him...or at least that how it's supposed to go.

So we arrive at the farm and Ilan is still dry. We check in and then head over to the potties...the porta-potties. As a side note, you have no idea how disgusting porta-potties are or many public bathrooms for that matter until you take a potty-training child who wants to touch EVERYTHING in one. At least as adults we can do our best to avoid contact with the grossness as much as possible, but kids just don't seem to get it. So, I hold Ilan up so he can pee into the toilet without touching. Ilan promises he doesn't have to poop. So, we're waiting for the tour to begin and Ilan declares "I have to go poopie!" Great (read it with sarcasm, as in "Great. I get to try to navigate pooping in a porta-potty with a toddler"...and remember I am 36 weeks pregnant). So we run over to the potty and I put paper-towels down (because I thought I forgot my heavy-duty toilet seat covers bought for occassions such as this) and get Ilan situated, then, nothing. The urge had passed. I made him sit there for a little bit to try again, but no, he didn't have to go anymore.

As the tour began and were making our way to the tractor for our ride around the farm I noticed Ilan was walking funny. As I got closer I noticed the smell. He had gone poopie. As we sat down on the tractor trailer I could see how uncomfortable he was. We started moving and I just couldn't let him sit in it. I didn't know how long it would be until we stopped and so I asked the moms around us if they would be offended if I changed him. Now, you would think that only a month out of diapers I would still have the nac of things, but for some unknown reason I decided to take his pull-ups off from a standing position. It probably would have been okay, but as I mentioned his fruit consumption the previous day was a little high. Things were a mess.

As the tractor made its way down the farm I used diaper wipe after diaper wipe on one of the messiest poops I have seen. It was on his shirt. It was on my hands. It was all over his bottom half. But in the end it was bagged up and sealed just in time for Ilan to try the fresh produce on the tour. Thank God for diaper wipes and hand sanitizer!

Remember the troll dolls?

2009-07-07T17:43:00.000-07:00

Opa and Oma thought they'd test Ilan's hair to see how long it is when straightened. The answer is pretty long and the look is pretty funny. I can't tell if he looks like an elf or a troll doll.

Why?

2009-06-17T14:30:00.000-07:00

I knew the day would come when every statement or answer given to Ilan would be followed by the question "why?" And so it has. When I told Scott the phenomenon had betgun he responded, in his lack of experience with whydom, by saying we should be sure to give Ilan a good answer when he asks why. When I gave him a look like he was crazy, it was only because in Ilan's short couple days of whying, I realized that clearly not all why questions have good answers. Sometimes things are just the way they are because that's the way they are. God give me wisdom to know which whys deserve a good answer...and maybe some help with the answer!

29 weeks

2009-06-12T14:27:00.000-07:00

Well, I was 29 weeks on Wednesday and it has finally become real that we are going to have another baby around. Thanks, Jen and friends from Shuvah, for the shower and all the fun things that helped me get into the swing of things. It's amazing how different the second pregnancy is. Until I saw all the baby clothes it just hadn't really set in.

Little Derek's (the newest nickname since Manny is no longer an option and Mr. Fisher became the latest sports hero last night) kicks are becoming very distinct. I'm sure I felt a little foot poking out this afternoon. We still don't have a name and we really don't have a list of names that we're trying to decide from. I suppose something will strike us the way Ilan's name did. (Speaking of which, I have just learned a new way that we will have trouble with his name. I received the e-mail confirmation for his swim classes and he was signed up as Ivan. I thought I had heard it all!)

I do wonder what this baby's personality will be like. Will he have the same zest for life that Ilan does or will he be more subdued? Will he be an introvert or an extrovert? We shall see.

All-in-all I'm feeling pretty good when I can get enough sleep. I've struggled with back pain this pregnancy, which was probably no different than pain I felt with Ilan, except that I have found a wonderful chiropractor who has really helped me feel better. Now that I know how good it feels to be pain free, I feel so awful when things flare up.

Giraffe Food

2009-06-08T07:26:00.000-07:00

While we were at the desert a couple of weeks ago we made a trip to the living desert and Ilan had the rare opportunity to feed the giraffes.

M3 Daddy

2009-06-08T07:15:00.000-07:00

I so appreciate that Scott wants to take an active part in parenting. When Ilan was born, Scott practically killed himself to go to school, work PT, write his thesis, and watch Ilan while I was working so that he didn't have to go to daycare. Now that I am home, it is great to know that he is also concerned about instilling in Ilan godly character. This week at the pool I agonized over whether I should interrupt when Ilan and some of the other children had arguments over the pool toys. I felt bad that I always come down on the other persons side...if it's Ilan's toy I tell him he needs to share. If it is the other child's toy I tell him he needs to wait or find something new to play with. Scott reminded me that we don't want to teach Ilan what is fair, but what is going to make him a better person.

Of course there is the fun play, too. I would never think to play with Ilan the way Scott does. It's a good thing God created dads because play time for little boys with mom would never be quite the adventure. I don't think I have ever inspired in Ilan the kind of laugh that Scott can get out of him.

M3 #2

2009-05-26T11:47:00.000-07:00

One of the things I think is absolutely adorable about Scott is his sense of chivalry, defined as: the combination of qualities expected of an ideal knight, especially courage, honor, courtesy, justice and readiness to help the weak. He is the kind of man who would die for a cause he felt is worthy and I know for certain that he would give his life to protect his family. It goes without saying that Braveheart is among his favorite movies and he is always looking for a story of heroism.

Manly, Man, Mondays M3 (except today is Tuesday)

2009-05-26T06:00:00.000-07:00

Marilee has gathered some of her fellow bloggers to start a group of women blogging about something they love, appreciate or value about their husbands each Monday. When I received the reminder yesterday (Monday), I honestly thought "Oh, good. I'll get this done in the morning." But here I am at my computer and I just realized it is Tuesday. (I'll blame it on the long weekend and our camping trip). So, my first M3 will be M2T.

The first quality I would like to share about Scott is his patience. This is a quality that I possess so minimally that his stands out like a light next to me. In situations where I am impulsive or rush to judgement, he is calm, evaluates things and will make a proper judgement when he is ready. This is true of him in major life decisions and in ordinary purchases. But mostly, he is patient with me and other people. Let's face it, I can be a jerk. Yet, he quietly abides with me and usually only teases me when the situation has blown over. I think this is part of what makes him a good teacher. He doesn't get frustrated when people don't "get it." He just patiently tries and tries again until they understand or can master it (or in my case they give up trying to play tennis). This is a quality I love about Scott and appreciate to see in him when he interacts with others.

To read what other ladies have said about their guys:
www.mishpacha.wordpress.com
http://www.tjandjessie.wordpress.com
http://www.moranandmelissa.blogspot.com/
http://lfamily5.wordpress.com
http://www.beasleyfam.com/
http://kruclan.wordpress.com/

Strawberry Fields Forever

2009-05-13T13:40:00.000-07:00

This morning Erin and I packed up the kids in her van and drove down to Pomona to the Kellog Farm where you can pick your own strawberries. It went a little faster than I expected, mostly because if you're going to make any progress, i.e. if you want to have more strawberries in the basket than in your child's tummy, you have to pick most of them yourself! I've never seen Ilan eat so many strawberries. When I got home I understood why...perfectly sweet and as Ilan would say, "Yummy in my tummy!"

Sunny Days

2009-05-02T21:12:00.000-07:00

Scott had a meeting at the beach on Saturday so we decided to take the opportunity to spend some family time down in San Clemente. Ilan, as usual, enjoyed the beach, but the water was a little chilly for swimming. Instead we combed the low tide and played in the sand. Next time Abba and Ima will also put sunscreen on themselves. Maybe my shoulders will feel better tomorrow.

They're back...

2009-05-01T16:49:00.000-07:00

Nothing at all like my paleteria in Dallas is La Mich...a Mexican ice cream shop and paleteria I found in Duarte. I've been wanting and wanting to go, but it never seems to work out for me. So, this afternoon as I was driving home from APU, where I went to get some journal articles on doulas, I thought to stop. In contrast to the non-English speaking workers, stark walls with maybe a word or picture of fruit to indicate the contents of each deep freezer of my Dallas Paleteria, a friendly girl assisted me from behind the counter where she pulled my dessert from a freezer case ala baskin robbins style. The walls were brightly painted, tables and chairs were set up for patrons to enjoy thier treats and the prices were fixed.

It was a hard decision, but I decided to go with Spicy Mango. I'm pretty sure they gave me Spicy Pineapple, though. Whatever it was, it was tasty...and spicy! As I drove down the freeway I pondered whether eating a popcycle and driving was an particularly dangerous...especially as my nose started to run from the heat this bad boy generated.

Gripe

2009-05-01T15:11:00.000-07:00

As is usually the case when Ilan comes into our bed at night, I awoke this morning with a super stiff back from shoulders to bottom. It is the result of contorting around him as he vies for more and more space on my pillow...not to mention the being pregnant part. I showered thinking the warm water would help alleviate my pain, which it did, and went out to see what Ilan was doing. He woke up at 6:15 this morning, which is sleeping in, and went up to my mom as I slowly got out of bed. When I emerged from the shower he was plopped on a chair in front of the television. I'd like to mention that while I do not restrict Ilan from watching TV, I like to limit it to the times that I need a break, not just a routine part of his day. I made Ilan breakfast and let him bring it into the TV room. (How did I become that mom?) As Ilan was ignoring his breakfast, the cat thought it looked pretty good. She jumped over to the side table, knocking Ilan's milk and the plate on to the floor in the process. Great. It was then and there that I decided to put an end to the food in front of the TV business. Who started that anyway? Okay. From now on Ilan will eat all of his meals strapped into his booster seat. That's final. I'm tired of chasing him around and trying to convince him that he needs to eat. I've had enough. As a side note, I have observed that the more people responsible for a child, the more freedom that child experiences. Everyone assumes someone else will draw the line until you wake up one morning (this morning) and realize that your child doesn't have enough boundaries. I just can't hope that we will all set the same boundaries for him. I have to enforce my boundaries. Look out!

So I get ready for the Chiropractor's and Ilan wants to come. Right before I leave I think to throw a quick load of laundry in, forgetting that earlier in the morning I had a nagging suspicion I needed to check my pocket because I probably left my phone in it. We get in the car and are running a little late because my mom walked us out and was having trouble strapping Ilan in the carseat. Ilan starts crying because he didn't want the seat belt as tight as I made it when I went to get him squared away and we drive off. Ilan is fussing that he wants me to wipe his eyes (from the tears that he shed while crying over the seatbelt) and we are just around the corner when my suspicion about the phone comes back to mind. We make a quick trip around the block, I run into the house and have my mom call my phone because it is not in any of the usual spots. I check the pocket of yesterday's pants, soaked of course, and didn't find it. I told Scott that I was pretty sure it was in the washer and ran out the door, snagging my pants on the door and ripping them as I passed by. The tear wasn't huge and so I decided to keep moving because I was already running really late for my appointment. Scott followed out with the phone, which he had fished out of the washer. Sigh.

And the Next Nassau Baby Will Be...

2009-04-28T11:38:00.001-07:00

Known affectionately as Manny until he makes his appearance. Yes, that's right we're having another boy...much to the dismay of everyone I know who thought it would be a girl (that's most people who've ventured to guess...even my chiropractor). Everything looks good and healthy. So, there you have it.

Garbage Heap

2009-04-25T19:24:00.001-07:00

I saw this the other day on Oprah and was shocked. I had no idea. (sorry the video is not complete).

It is so easy to just assume that your lifestyle can't make a difference...I mean who hasn't thought "ah, what's the difference?" I know about landfills being overflowed and have thought about how much we waste, but the fact that our trash - literally the random bits that wash away from the shore or find their way down a storm drain have caused a huge garbage dump in the ocean was shocking to me. I admit I've become lazy. We recycle, but I often don't go the extra step. This show has inspired me to renew my committment to reduce, reuse, and recycle. Here are a few ideas I came up with for my own life:

Use plastic containers for Ilan's snacks instead of baggies.
Purchase less packaged food items (come on, it's better for you anyway).
Remember to bring my cloth bags to the grocery store and use them instead of the gazillion plastic bags they always give.
Wash out recyclable packaging from packaged foods and recycle them.
Use a reusable water bottle and fill it up instead of using disposable water bottles.
Recycle my junk mail and newspapers.
Go for the cloth towel instead of the handi-wipe or paper towel.

So I am asking you what you think you can do (please write some ideas in your comments)? Small changes can make a world of difference.

2009-04-24T15:34:00.000-07:00

Life lately, with the exception of last week (Ilan had a cold), has been a series of play-dates in the park. Thanks, Shannon, Erin, Marilee, Sarah, Sophia, and Valerie for helping keep us busy! Last week, when Ilan had a cold and all play-dates were cancelled I realized how much I need them too! I took my camera along yesterday for a little photo shoot.

I had to crop this picture a little bit once I saw Ilan's expression. Trouble.